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Failure is proof that the desire wasn’t strong enough. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer. v.1

Failure is proof that the desire wasn’t strong enough. v. 1
The passion of achieving something is called desire. Sometimes, people remain unsuccessful in attaining their goal, and this phenomenon is known as failure. There is a relation between the desire and attempts, and become successful. Every man has a specific goal in his life, and he works hard to be succeed in achieving their aim. In some cases, he remains unsuccessful in his efforts, but that does not mean his wish was poor. The individual should try again and again to catch his goal. There are many incidents in history of such facts. For example, the king, Napoleon tried his best for six times to regain his lost kingdom, but failed all the time. He, however, did not give up his hope, and he continued his endeavour. Failure in gaining the wish all the time does not prove the weak desire. The attempts, notwithstanding, may be inadequate in some way in attaining the goal. The critic, however, may give blame for unsuccessful, but the person should not take it seriously. The guy should not abandon his efforts. He should try again and again, and finally, he might achieve his desired goal. For instance, Napoleon, tried six times with his full strength, and after seventh time he was able to regain his regime. In conclusion, it can be said that, attempts and success are closely related. Without efforts anyone can not achieve his goal, but he might be unsuccessful in his initial attempts. He, therefore, should not be hopeless, rather, he should start the work with more energy.
The passion of achieving something
is called
desire.
Sometimes
,
people
remain
unsuccessful
in attaining their
goal
, and this phenomenon
is known
as failure. There is a relation between the desire and
attempts
, and become successful.

Every
man
has a specific
goal
in his life, and he works
hard
to be
succeed
in achieving their aim. In
some
cases, he remains
unsuccessful
in his efforts,
but
that does not mean his wish was poor. The individual should try
again
and
again
to catch his goal.

There are
many
incidents in history of such facts.
For example
, the king, Napoleon tried his best for six
times
to regain his lost kingdom,
but
failed all the
time
. He,
however
, did not give up his hope, and he continued his
endeavour
.

Failure in gaining the wish all the
time
does not prove the weak desire. The
attempts
, notwithstanding, may be inadequate in
some
way in attaining the
goal
. The critic,
however
, may give blame for
unsuccessful
,
but
the person should not take it
seriously
.

The
guy should not abandon his efforts. He should try
again
and
again
, and
finally
, he might achieve his desired
goal
.
For instance
, Napoleon, tried six
times
with his full strength, and after seventh
time
he was able to regain his regime.

In conclusion
, it can
be said
that,
attempts
and success are
closely
related. Without efforts anyone can not achieve his
goal
,
but
he might be
unsuccessful
in his initial
attempts
. He,
therefore
, should not be hopeless,
rather
, he should
start
the work with more energy.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Failure is proof that the desire wasn’t strong enough. v. 1

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
257 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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