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The use of social media is replacing face-to-face interaction among many people in society. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v.3

The use of social media is replacing face-to-face interaction among many people in society. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3
Nowadays, traditional communicate is being replaced with social converstation using social media app, such as facebook, zalo or instagram. This trend would introduced both side, but i think benifits of using social media have brought to our lives are overweigh the drawbacks. On the one hand, it is clear that social media bring about serveral drawbacks. People who using online media are dependent on the stability of the Internet. For instance, when the internet connection have a problem is it extremly hard to countinue a converstation. In addition, there are some people use social networking by many wrong way or overuse it too much. Young people is the model of people who do this, many conflits happen just because they are dissented and strate at their phone when they have dinner with family without paying attention to people around them. On the orther hand, there are many benifits of online converstation. Fristly, people using it can easier keep in touch with our loved ones who are different for them to interact face - to - face. For example, students studying aboard can keep in contact with their family, friends on daily baisis using video call of social media app such as sky, facebook. . . Secondly, social media is also a powerful tool in education. Students who do not conditions or can not antend face-to-face classes will be easily replaced with distance learning where they are carried out over the internet or by post. For practicial example is in this year 2020, virus Covid -19 is compel almost schools in the world suspend operation in a long time so that distance learning always the best way for everyone who are studying to ensure safety and still have basic knowledges. Finaly, the informations that social media brought to people should mention. For exemple, It will be easier and faster to get daily news about covid- 19 via social networking In conclusion, there are many minus points of social media. However, its seem to me that drawbacks are outweighed by benifits.
Nowadays, traditional communicate is
being replaced
with
social
converstation
using
social
media
app, such as
facebook
,
zalo
or
instagram
. This trend would
introduced
both side,
but
i
think
benifits
of using
social
media
have brought to our
lives
are
overweigh
the drawbacks.

On the one hand, it is
clear
that
social
media
bring about
serveral
drawbacks.
People
who
using online
media
are dependent on the stability of the Internet.
For instance
, when the internet connection have a problem is it
extremly
hard
to
countinue
a
converstation
.
In addition
, there are
some
people
use
social
networking by
many
wrong
way or overuse it too much. Young
people
is
the model of
people
who
do this,
many
conflits
happen
just
because
they
are dissented
and
strate
at their phone when they have dinner with family without paying attention to
people
around them.

On the
orther
hand, there are
many
benifits
of online
converstation
.
Fristly
,
people
using it can easier
keep
in touch with our
loved
ones
who
are
different
for them to interact face
-
to
-
face.
For example
, students studying aboard can
keep
in contact with their family, friends on daily
baisis
using video call of
social
media
app such as sky,
facebook
.
.
.
Secondly
,
social
media
is
also
a powerful tool in education. Students
who
do not
conditions
or can not
antend
face-to-face classes will be
easily
replaced with distance learning where they
are carried
out over the internet or by post. For
practicial
example is in this year 2020, virus
Covid
-19 is
compel
almost schools in the world suspend operation in a long time
so
that distance learning always the best way for everyone
who
are studying to ensure safety and
still
have basic
knowledges
.
Finaly
, the
informations
that
social
media
brought to
people
should mention. For
exemple
, It will be easier and faster to
get
daily news about
covid
- 19 via
social
networking


In conclusion
, there are
many
minus points of
social
media
.
However
, its seem to me that drawbacks
are outweighed
by
benifits
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay The use of social media is replacing face-to-face interaction among many people in society. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
339 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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