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f you were asked to choose one place in your country where would you take atourist, which one would you choose? Why? What is especially impressive aboutthe place? v.1

f you were asked to choose one place in your country where would you take atourist, which one would you choose? Why? What is especially impressive aboutthe place? v. 1
Many are of the opinion that art is vital, however, another group of people oppose this opinion. This essay will state why I agree with the former that art is essential because it can be used to beautify an environment and it is also preserving the heritage of a people. Art can make an environment beautiful. They can come in various forms such as drawings, artefacts, paintings and so on. They are utilized to add to the aesthetic of an environment. For example, in various homes and offices in Nigeria, these works are hung on the walls, and serve as a way to make the place more attractive. Furthermore, culture which is another form of art is very important. This is the way of life of a people and preserving it is important because it is a way to ensure that the heritage, customs and values of a society is kept alive from generation to generation. For instance, in Nigeria, a lot of ethnic groups have their various cultural attires and folk songs which they have maintained from time immemorial and this have been very useful for the preservation of their heritage. Also, there are quite a number of museums where Nigerian artworks are on display, artworks such as Benin, Nok culture, this have served to maintain the Nigerian customs and tradition. To conclude, I firmly agree with the view that art is very important because it can be used to maintain a beautiful surrounding and it is also a means to keep our various traditions alive.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
are of the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is vital,
however
, another group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
oppose this opinion. This essay will state why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the former that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is essential
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to beautify an environment and it is
also
preserving the heritage of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Art can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an environment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
. They can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
forms such as drawings,
Possible spelling mistake. 'artefacts' is British English.
artefacts
, paintings and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. They
are utilized
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
to the aesthetic of an environment.
For example
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
homes and offices in Nigeria, these works
are hung
on the walls, and serve as a way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the place more attractive.

Furthermore
, culture which is another form of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. This is the way of life of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and preserving it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is a way to ensure that the heritage, customs and values of a society is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
alive from generation to generation.
For instance
, in Nigeria,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
ethnic groups have their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
cultural attires and folk songs which they have maintained from time immemorial and
The verb 'have' is plural. Did you mean: "this has"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
this have
been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful for the preservation of their heritage.
Also
, there are quite a number of museums where Nigerian artworks are on display, artworks such as Benin,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nok
culture,
The verb 'have' is plural. Did you mean: "this has"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
this have
served to maintain the Nigerian customs and tradition.

To conclude
, I
firmly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to maintain a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
surrounding and it is
also
a means to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
traditions alive.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay f you were asked to choose one place in your country where would you take atourist, which one would you choose? Why? What is especially impressive aboutthe place? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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