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Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.21

India is a democratic country. It has a population of about 1. 384 billlion. In India, there are rural as well as urban areas. In urban areas or cities, most of the people are educated and are employed. They can earn their living. In towns or cities, there are good and well equipped hospitals. People get good treatment from any hospital. But in rural areas, even today there is lack of hospitals. Due to this, some people are losing their lives for not getting proper treatments. Even the pregnant ladies are delivering baby at their home. Some women are losing their lives while giving birth. I would like to share an incident with you which had happened in one of the rural area of Karnataka. A nine months pregnant had her labour pain and she had some health issues due to which she had been taken to a private hospital. Doctor informed the lady's husband to pay the hospital bill first and then the delivery will be done. The delivery charge was Rs. 50, 000. But her husband wasn't capable of paying the huge amount. He requested the doctor that the amount will be paid later. But the doctor did not agree with this. Husband tried to assemble some amount of money for the delivery. But it was late and the pregnant lady died due to delay in delivery. This made me feel very bad for the woman and also angry for the doctors behaviour. I feel that every country should have a well equipped hospital with free health service. This helps the poor people to take treatment easily with zero percent charge. The government should take some actions to build this type of hospitals in almost every country.
India is a democratic country. It has a population of about 1. 384 billlion. In India, there are rural
as well
as urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. In urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
or cities, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are educated
and
are employed
. They can earn their living. In towns or cities, there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and well equipped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospitals
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
treatment from any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
there is lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospitals
. Due to this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are losing their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
for not getting proper treatments. Even the pregnant ladies are delivering baby at their home.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
women are losing their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
while giving birth. I would like to share an incident with you which had happened in one of the rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
of Karnataka. A nine months pregnant had her labour pain and she had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
health issues due to which she had
been taken
to a private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Doctor
informed the lady's husband to pay the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
bill
first
and then the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delivery
will
be done
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delivery
charge was Rs. 50, 000.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
her husband wasn't capable of paying the huge amount. He requested the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctor
that the amount will
be paid
later.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctor
did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this. Husband tried to assemble
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
amount of money for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delivery
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it was late and the pregnant lady
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
died
due to delay in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delivery
. This made me feel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
for the woman and
also
angry for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doctors
behaviour. I feel that every country should have a well equipped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
with free health service. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to take treatment
easily
with zero percent charge. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
actions to build this type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospitals
in almost every country.
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IELTS essay : Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
289 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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