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Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.15

Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. v. 15
Access to a reliable and good quality health service is important for the people of any country. Developments in medical treatment and technology have seen the increased costs of healthcare, making it unaffordable to many people in the community. However, I totally agree with the fact that a free health service should be provided to citizens and in this essay I will state the reasons for my view. The major compelling reason for holding to my view is that it would be difficult for seniors and unemployed citizens to afford their own medical costs. As they do not have any source of income, thus it makes them more susceptible to death in the case of illness. In addition to this, the government is responsible for the wellness of its citizens and therefore should take necessary actions to improve people's wellness by providing them lofty medications without charging a single penny. Another reason for my view is that government should take care of its citizens to enlarge the country’s business. The economy of the country directly depends on its own people and everyone has to be in good shape and fit to work to make it expand. The tax money from the citizens can be used to support the free medical services and treatments to those who needed. In conclusion, I totally agree with the opinion that every citizen should have the right to get support of free wellness services even though the latest technologies and treatments might be expensive. Given this situation, it is recommended that the government should invest the funds and provide the best health and care services to the citizens without charging them.
Access to a reliable and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
quality health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of any country. Developments in medical treatment and technology have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
the increased costs of healthcare, making it unaffordable to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the community.
However
, I
totally
Consider using "agree that".
agree with the fact that
a free health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
should
be provided
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
and in this essay I will state the reasons for my view.

The major compelling reason for holding to my view is that it would be difficult for seniors and unemployed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
to afford their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
medical costs. As they do not have any source of income,
thus
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them more susceptible to death in the case of illness.
In addition
to this, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is responsible for the wellness of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
and
therefore
should take necessary actions to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's wellness by providing them lofty medications without charging a single penny.

Another reason for my view is that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should take care of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
to enlarge the country’s business. The economy of the country
directly
depends on its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and everyone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
shape and fit to work to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it expand. The tax money from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to support the free medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
and treatments to those who needed.

In conclusion
, I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the opinion that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizen
should have the right to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
support of free wellness
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
even though
the latest technologies and treatments might be expensive.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
this situation, it
is recommended
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should invest the funds and provide the best health and care
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
without charging them.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. v. 15

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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