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Email is a fast and convenient way to communicate and written letters aren t needed anymore To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement v.1

Email is a fast and convenient way to communicate and written letters aren t needed anymore with this statement v. 1
Some people think that it is necessary for scientific researches to be conducted under the control of the authorities instead of private companies. Personally, I completely agree with this idea for a number of reasons, which will be outlined in this essay. There are several reasons to support my point of view. First of all, almost scientific research require a long time to succeed and produce profits. Meanwhile, the top priority of private firms is to earn interest as much and shortly as possible. Furthermore, researches need stable funding during the time they are conducted, which is only possible for the government. Secondly, the main aim of research carried out by the authorities is to improve the quality of people's lives, which has hardly ever received the attention of companies. For example, many non-profit researches have been conducted by the government, such as environmental or educational ones. Moreover, because the government has a social responsibility, when new products are invented, their prices are controlled to suit for consumers. Thirdly, scientific matters like global warming need dealing with in a very large scale and investment. This is not difficult for governments from different countries as they can co-operate with each other to do research and find the solutions. Finally, when the authorities controlled research activities, there will be the utmost security and no intentional information misleading. They do not disclose any data which can have a negative impact on the national economy and politics. On the other hand, when private companies undertake research, they usually try to complete them in such a short time to protect their interest. As a result, the accuracy of results cannot be ensured. Furthermore, although companies are given right to do scientific researches, we cannot see to it that their activities are always under control and not related to illegal experiments such as nuclear weapons. In conclusion, I believe that scientific researches should be carried out and controlled by governments rather than the private companies.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is necessary for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
researches
to
be conducted
under the control of the authorities
instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
.
Personally
, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
for a number of reasons, which will
be outlined
in this essay.

There are several reasons to support my point of view.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, almost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
require a long time to succeed and produce profits. Meanwhile, the top priority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
firms is to earn interest as much and shortly as possible.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
researches
need stable funding during the time they
are conducted
, which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
possible for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
Secondly
, the main aim of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
carried out by the authorities is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the quality of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, which has hardly ever received the attention of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
non-profit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
researches
have
been conducted
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, such as environmental or educational ones.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has a social responsibility, when new products
are invented
, their prices
are controlled
to suit for consumers.
Thirdly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scientific
matters like global warming need dealing with in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
large scale and investment. This is not difficult for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries as they can co-operate with each other to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
and find the solutions.
Finally
, when the authorities controlled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
activities, there will be the utmost security and no intentional information misleading. They do not disclose any data which can have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the national economy and politics.

On the other hand
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
undertake
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
, they
usually
try to complete them in such a short time to protect their interest.
As a result
, the accuracy of results cannot
be ensured
.
Furthermore
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
right to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
researches
, we cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
to it that their activities are always under control and not related to illegal experiments such as nuclear weapons.

In conclusion
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
researches
should
be carried
out and controlled by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
rather
than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Email is a fast and convenient way to communicate and written letters aren t needed anymore with this statement v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
329 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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