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Educationalists think that international exchange visits are important for teenage school students. Do you agree? v.1

Educationalists think that international exchange visits are important for teenage school students. Do you agree? v. 1
Different countries have plethora of approaches towards education. Pedagogies believe that an overseas exchange visit is important for school teenagers. I agree with this notion because students can acquire foreign method and language. Which will enhance their skills. To begin with, The First and foremost reason for my agreement is because of technique which will be acquired by applicants when they go to another nation on an exchange program. Usually host country has their traditional method which is followed from generation and it is designed by the educationalist long time ago which are also good. But there are students who are exceptional and when they learn the overseas method they shall further excel. For instance, my friend John was offered an opportunity to pursue last year in Canada and from this program he acquires the smart technique. Which he applied in his examination and was ranked first in the entire country. Therefore, it not only benefited in school but also used this technique in his higher education. Furthermore, the positive feature which is obtained by applicants for this program is that it enabled in acquiring the foreign language. Student when they were in host country the language is usually spoken in the native language for informal conversation and formally during school hours. Hence it was not helpful in master the language throughout. Therefore, Student when they land on foreign land they need to communicate with foreign language only. Thus continuous speaking in their language has mastered student in English which has assisted in higher studies. For instance, John English was intermediate level in secondary school and after return from abroad after finishing the program has made him advance user. Therefore, this trip was highly beneficial in advancing Johns language skills. In conclusion, overseas learning technique and language skill are 2 main advantages which is acquired in foreign program and due to this I strongly agree with the notion. Thus, benefits of the students exchangeprogram far outweigh the drawbacks.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have plethora of approaches towards education. Pedagogies believe that an overseas exchange visit is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this notion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can acquire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
method and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. Which will enhance their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, The
First
and foremost reason for my agreement is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technique
which will
be acquired
by applicants when they go to another nation on an exchange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
.
Usually
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has their traditional method which
is followed
from generation and it
is designed
by the educationalist long time ago which are
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who are exceptional and when they learn the overseas method they shall
further
excel.
For instance
, my friend John
was offered
an opportunity to pursue last year in Canada and from this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
he acquires the smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technique
. Which he applied in his examination and
was ranked
first
in the entire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Therefore
, it not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
benefited in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technique
in his higher education.

Furthermore
, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
feature which
is obtained
by applicants for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
is that it enabled in acquiring the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Student
when they were in host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is
usually
spoken in the native
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
for informal conversation and
formally
during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
hours.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
it was not helpful in master the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
throughout.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Student
when they land on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
land they need to communicate with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
continuous speaking in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
has mastered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
in English which has assisted in higher studies.
For instance
, John English was intermediate level in secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and after return from abroad after finishing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
has made him advance user.
Therefore
, this trip was
highly
beneficial in advancing Johns
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

In conclusion
, overseas learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technique
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
are 2 main advantages which
is acquired
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
and due to this I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the notion.
Thus
, benefits of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
Possible spelling mistake found.
exchangeprogram
far outweigh the drawbacks.
22Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
37Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay Educationalists think that international exchange visits are important for teenage school students. Do you agree? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
328 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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