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education is not a luxury but a basic right. IT should be free for everyone. do you agree v.1

education is not a luxury but a basic right. IT should be free for everyone. do you agree v. 1
It is argued that everyone should be entitled to get education regardless of their financial backgrounds and no one needs to pay for it. Although I strongly agree that the authorities should make education free for the poor, I think it is unnecessary to let all social classes, including the affluent, receive education without tuition fees. There is no denying that offering free education to the poor will have a positive influence on the national economy and society. Firstly, there are many students from lower income families that cannot afford to pursue their studies without the government's support like funding or scholarships. If poor people are allowed to gain essential knowledge and skills from education with the assistance of the authorities, they will be more likely to find work in the future. As a result, they are not only able to support their families, but also contribute to the development of the country. Secondly, giving young people chances to access to education is an effective solution to reduce crime rates. Moral values provided by education guide humans to keep away from illegal activities and they also make people less susceptible to being taken in or becoming victims of a deception. It is true that the literacy rate among the public will considerably rise if education is free of charge for all different walks of life. However, this is unfeasible as the state budget is limited and there are many crucial fields that need investing money to be developed as well. Furthermore, tuition fees are financial resources used to implement studies and upgrade educational facilities. But for money, lots of research cannot be conducted and the overall quality of education may be lowered. In conclusion, I believe that people who have low-income background should be assisted to get education. By contrast, there is no need for education to be free for those who have the ability to pay for it.
It
is argued
that everyone should
be entitled
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
regardless of their financial backgrounds and no one needs to pay for it. Although I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the authorities should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
for the poor, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is unnecessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
all social classes, including the affluent, receive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
without tuition fees.

There is no denying that offering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
to the poor will have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influence on the national economy and society.
Firstly
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
students from lower income families that cannot afford to pursue their studies without the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
's support like funding or scholarships. If poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to gain essential knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
with the assistance of the authorities, they will be more likely to find work in the future.
As a result
, they are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
able to support their families,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
contribute to the development of the country.
Secondly
, giving young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
chances
to access to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is an effective solution to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
crime rates. Moral values provided by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
guide humans to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
away from illegal
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
activities and
they
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
less susceptible to
being taken
in or becoming victims of a deception.

It is true that the literacy rate among the public will
considerably
rise if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
of charge for all
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
walks of life.
However
, this is unfeasible as the state budget
is limited
and there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
crucial fields that need investing money to
be developed
as well
.
Furthermore
, tuition fees are financial resources
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to implement studies and upgrade educational facilities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
for money, lots of research cannot
be conducted
and the
overall
quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
may
be lowered
.

In conclusion
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who have low-income background should
be assisted
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. By contrast, there is no need for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
for those who have the ability to pay for it.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay education is not a luxury but a basic right. IT should be free for everyone. do you agree v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
319 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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