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Modern technology, such as personal computers and the internet, have made it possible for many people to do their work from home at least part of the time instead of going to an office everyday. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of this situation? v.4

Modern technology, such as personal computers and the internet, have made it possible for many people to do their work from home at least part of the time instead of going to an office everyday. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of this situation? v. 4
In the modern world, technological breakthroughs have made changes to every facet of humankind, including the way people work. As a matter of fact, the number of those who are computer- literate is increasing, leading to the prevalence of working from home. Despite some undeniable advantages, many drawbacks should be taken into consideration. On the one hand, no one can deny the fact that working at home can bring certain benefits to the society. The most significant point is that the corporate organization has no longer need the giant station space office space, which by consequence reduces substantial sums of money. Besides, employees can enjoy freedom. That is to say, executives can efficiently prioritize their works coordinating their task schedule with family and personal tasks. This opportunity is simply great for those with physical disabilities and single parent homes. On the other hand, I personally opine that it is not a good practice to work for office staying at home. It is essential for people to go to office. The first reason is about human communication. Long hours spent in a computer- based work environment really discourages real interaction while in the workplace, colleagues can exchange words and enhance their interpersonal skills. Even, becoming over- reliant on computers could trigger a mental illness such as autism if workers segregate themselves from the human contact in the long run. Moreover, although office distractions are avoided by working at home, some different distractions may arise. The temptation to engage in household matters since you are at home is very often. Suddenly you may start feeling obliged to clean the home, do the shopping, the childcare or the cooking. Consequently, workers may not be as productive as compared to the time of working at their workplace. In conclusion, although positive impacts of job from home option for modern people are considered, i am firmly convinced that it drawbacks are much weightier than the advantages. People should draw a line between home and work so as to avoid both areas of sufferings.
In the modern world, technological breakthroughs have made
changes
to every facet of humankind, including the way
people
work
. As a matter of fact, the number of those who are computer- literate is increasing, leading to the prevalence of
working
from home. Despite
some
undeniable advantages,
many
drawbacks should
be taken
into consideration.

On the one hand, no one can deny the fact that
working
at home can bring certain benefits to the society. The most significant point is that the corporate organization has no longer need the giant station space
office
space, which by consequence
reduces
substantial sums of money.
Besides
, employees can enjoy freedom.
That is
to say, executives can
efficiently
prioritize their works coordinating their task schedule with family and personal tasks. This opportunity is
simply
great for those with physical disabilities and single parent homes.

On the other hand
, I
personally
opine that it is not a
good
practice to
work
for
office
staying at home. It is essential for
people
to go to
office
. The
first
reason is about human communication. Long hours spent in a computer- based
work
environment
really
discourages real interaction while in the workplace, colleagues can exchange words and enhance their interpersonal
skills
. Even, becoming over- reliant on computers could trigger a mental illness such as autism if workers segregate themselves from the human contact in the long run.
Moreover
, although
office
distractions
are avoided
by
working
at home,
some
different
distractions may arise. The temptation to engage in household matters since you are at home is
very
often
.
Suddenly
you may
start
feeling obliged to clean the home, do the shopping, the childcare or the cooking.
Consequently
, workers may not be as productive as compared to the time of
working
at their workplace.

In conclusion
, although
positive
impacts of job from home option for modern
people
are considered
,
i
am
firmly
convinced that
it drawbacks
are much weightier than the advantages.
People
should draw a line between home and
work
so as to
avoid both areas of sufferings.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages knows nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Modern technology, such as personal computers and the internet, have made it possible for many people to do their work from home at least part of the time instead of going to an office everyday. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of this situation? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
338 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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