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Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small, local business are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small, local business are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. v. 3
It is often argued that the rapid expansion of supermarkets badly effects on the growth of small scale local business and indirectly increasing the poverty of the local community. In my opinion I strongly believe that there is a decline in the profit of local enterprises as wealthy customers use to fulfil their daily needs from supermarkets and at the end they will be closed to the poor local community as well. The problem that, accompanied by the closure of grocery shops is that families with low income finds it difficult to fulfil their daily food needs. Firstly the people have to travel far for supermarkets. Secondly, the goods are not affordable for a low class family. One of the main reasons for the declination of the quality of life due to the closure of small business is the travelling issue. An extra cost have to be incurred to travel as everyone doesn’t have own vehicles. At the same time journey to the cities take time due to the huge traffic and this interrupts daily activities of self-employers. This issue should be taken into consideration to uplift the lives of the local community. Another major problem faced is the goods in city markets are not being affordable for many customers. Since the goods are kept in air-conditioned chambers under a good hygienic conditions the cost incurred on them is high and the selling prices will be greater than those in small boutiques which is an issue with no solution. As a result, people try to reduce the consumption of essentials like food, sanitary products, medicine and etc. Which paves the way to poor performance in industries and education. In conclusion, we can say that closure of small business interrupts the socioeconomic stability of an area and necessary steps must be taken to encourage self-employment, small scale productions, markets and etc. So that the all the requirements can be fulfilled within that area itself.
It is
often
argued that the rapid expansion of supermarkets
badly
effects on the growth of
small
scale
local
business and
indirectly
increasing the poverty of the
local
community. In my opinion I
strongly
believe that there is a decline in the profit of
local
enterprises as wealthy customers
use to
fulfil their daily needs from supermarkets and at the
end
they will
be closed
to the poor
local
community
as well
. The problem that, accompanied by the closure of grocery shops is that families with low income finds it difficult to fulfil their daily food needs.
Firstly
the
people
have to
travel far for supermarkets.
Secondly
, the
goods
are not affordable for a low
class
family.

One of the main reasons for the declination of the quality of life due to the closure of
small
business is the travelling issue. An extra cost
have to
be incurred
to travel as everyone doesn’t have
own
vehicles. At the same time journey to the cities take time due to the huge traffic and this interrupts daily activities of self-employers. This issue should
be taken
into consideration to uplift the
lives
of the
local
community.

Another major problem faced is the
goods
in city markets are not being affordable for
many
customers. Since the
goods
are
kept
in air-conditioned chambers under a
good
hygienic conditions the cost incurred on them is high and the selling prices will be greater than those in
small
boutiques which is an issue with no solution.
As a result
,
people
try to
reduce
the consumption of essentials like food, sanitary products, medicine
and etc
. Which paves the way to poor performance in industries and education.

In conclusion
, we can say that closure of
small
business interrupts the socioeconomic stability of an area and necessary steps
must
be taken
to encourage self-employment,
small
scale productions, markets
and etc
.
So that
the all the requirements can
be fulfilled
within that area itself.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small, local business are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
323 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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