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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement It is much easier for people to achieve success without their family members’ help now than in the past? v.1

It is much easier for people to achieve success without their family members’ help now than in the past? v. 1
The internet plays a vital role in storing and disseminating information. Some people assert that before long it will replace books. The positive and negative aspects of this development will be discussed in this essay. The internet has made it easy to find information. Any information that we need is now available at the click of a button. The internet has also made traditional sources of information such as books redundant. Nowadays people do not have to carry bulky paper books in their backpack. Instead, they can store ebooks on their laptop, Kindle or smartphone. There are obvious benefits to this. EBooks do not occupy space. They are much less expensive than printed books and can be shared with anyone within a fraction of seconds. On the flip side, if books get completely replaced by the internet or EBooks, a few negative things may also happen. To start with, reading an eBook for hours on end can strain the eyes. People who constantly stare at a screen may also develop other health problems like neck pain and back pain. A paper book, by contrast, can be read for any length of time without experiencing any of these difficulties. Another drawback of internet based sources of the information is that they are not always available. We need an internet connection and a supporting device to be able to access them. Because of this reason, the internet is not a good companion when we travel. Paper books, on the other hand, make excellent travel buddies. Another downside of the internet is that the information available on it is not always reliable. To conclude, the internet has certainly replaced paper books and the sale of eBooks is soaring; however, I do not believe that books will be completely out of fashion because of their inherent advantages that eBooks lack.
The internet plays a vital role in storing and disseminating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
assert that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
long it will replace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. The
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects of this development will
be discussed
in this essay.

The internet has made it easy to find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
. Any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
that we need is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
available at the click of a button. The internet has
also
made traditional sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
redundant. Nowadays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
carry bulky paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in their backpack.
Instead
, they can store
Possible spelling mistake found.
ebooks
on their laptop, Kindle or smartphone. There are obvious benefits to this.
Possible spelling mistake found.
EBooks
do not occupy space. They are much less expensive than printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and can
be shared
with anyone within a fraction of seconds.

On the flip side, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
completely replaced by the internet or
Possible spelling mistake found.
EBooks
, a few
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
things may
also
happen. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, reading an
Possible spelling mistake found.
eBook
for hours on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
can strain the eyes.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
who
constantly
stare at a screen may
also
develop other health problems like neck pain and back pain. A paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
, by contrast, can
be read
for any length of time without experiencing any of these difficulties. Another drawback of internet based sources of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
is that they are not always available. We need an internet connection and a supporting device to be able to access them.
Because of this
reason, the internet is not a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
companion when we travel. Paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
,
on the other hand
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
excellent travel buddies. Another downside of the internet is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
available on it is not always reliable.

To conclude
, the internet has
certainly
replaced paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and the sale of
Possible spelling mistake found.
eBooks
is soaring;
however
, I do not believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
will be completely out of fashion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their inherent advantages that
Possible spelling mistake found.
eBooks
lack.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay It is much easier for people to achieve success without their family members’ help now than in the past? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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