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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Because the world is changing so quickly people now are less happy or less satisfied with their lives than people were in the past Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer v.2

Because the world is changing so quickly people now are less happy or less satisfied with their lives than people were in the past Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer v. 2
Life is changing in a rapid rhythm that we can not pursuit it, even the people' s feelings towards the surroundings have differed. In my opinion, I believe that people today are less satisfied with their lives and in this essay I will demonstrate my reasons for that support. First, people nowadays have to work hard for the majority of the day and every day. They work about 12 hours per day to make their living and gain experience qualifying them to the best. As a result, they can not enjoy their time doing activities they love or spending too much time with their beloved ones. All these stressful situations rip them off happiness and satisfaction. From my personal experience, I work as a radiologist in a hospital and I go to my work at 7 a. m passing through difficult and exhausting work hours in the hospital and then return home at 6 p. m very tired. I do not have time or even ability to go out with my kids or even try to read a book as I have to finish my house work. All these factors prevent me from relishing anything in my life. In the past decades, people, in contrast, were working for less hours and doing less work as the life was simple. Secondly, because of the development we see around us and the invention of many devices and machines that facilitate people' s lives, they are always seeking for more and became unsatisfied with what they already have. For instance, people now are collectors for any thing new and modern, they do not appreciate what they possess and need to buy more and more things, this makes them always sad and unsatisfied. In the past, the resources were limited and people had less options to choose from, so they did not feel insufficiency and lived in peace. Lastly, not only the technological development that increased, also the disease rates have elevated too as a price for the civilization. Chronic diseases like hypertension, diabetes and cancer are now considered this era' s disorders. Besides, infectious diseases caused by viruses and bacteria spread as well, which deprived them from their inner peace and their ability to savor life. In the summary, every thing is different now and the people changed too because of development and the stressful events happening around them in the world.
Life is changing in a rapid rhythm that we
The word 'pursuit' is a noun or an adjective. A verb is missing or misspelled, or maybe a comma is missing.
can not pursuit
it, even the
Possible spelling mistake found.
people&
#039; s feelings towards the surroundings have differed. In my opinion, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
satisfied with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and in this essay I will demonstrate my reasons for that support.

First
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
nowadays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for the majority of the day and every day. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
about 12 hours per day to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their living and gain experience qualifying them to the best.
As a result
, they can not enjoy their time doing activities they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
or spending too much time with their beloved ones. All these stressful situations rip them off happiness and satisfaction. From my personal experience, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as a radiologist in a hospital and I go to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at 7 a. m passing through difficult and exhausting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
hours in the hospital and then return home at 6 p. m
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
tired. I do not have time or even ability to go out with my kids or even try to read a book as I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
finish my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. All these factors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
me from relishing anything in my life. In the past decades,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
in contrast
, were working for
Did you mean "fewer hours"?
less hours
and doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as the life was simple.

Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the development we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
around us and the invention of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
devices and machines that facilitate
Possible spelling mistake found.
people&
#039; s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, they are always seeking for more and became unsatisfied with what they already have.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
are collectors for
Did you mean "anything"?
any thing
new and modern, they do not appreciate what they possess and need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
more and more things, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them always sad and unsatisfied. In the past, the resources
were limited
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
had
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun options is countable.
less
options to choose from,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they did not feel insufficiency and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in peace.

Lastly
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the technological development that increased,
also
the disease rates have elevated too as a price for the civilization. Chronic diseases like hypertension, diabetes and cancer are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
considered this
Possible spelling mistake found.
era&
#039; s disorders.
Besides
, infectious diseases caused by viruses and bacteria spread
as well
, which
The usual collocation for "deprived" is "of" not "them". Did you mean "deprived them of"?
deprived them from
their inner peace and their ability to savor life.

In the summary, every thing is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of development and the stressful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
happening around them in the world.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Because the world is changing so quickly people now are less happy or less satisfied with their lives than people were in the past Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
399 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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