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People's shopping habits depend more on the age group they belong to than any other factors. Do you agree or disagree? v.10

People's shopping habits depend more on the age group they belong to than any other factors. v. 10
In this up-to-date era people fascination for shopping increasing tremendously. In that case, several people asserted that shopping intention depend more on the age. Mainly, I agree with this idea but I also believe that it depend on mentality and situation. So, this essay will explain the topic on the base of it. To begin with, nowadays young nations are doing shipping more than senior citizen. As a repercussion fashion homes and shopping mall are keeping, maintaining products more according to the choose of up-to-date generation because they are more habited to the shopping. For example, UAE well-known newspaper ' Gulf News' published that Dubai Mall 60%-70% customers are under the age of 18-25 years. Thus, shopping habit mostly depend on age. Moreover, modern generation live a busy, hestic and charming lifestyle with new technology. As a result now all over the world online shopping is increasing rapidly and their main target to attract the people 18-30 years. For instance, survey of USA ' Fashion Magazine' teenage people are doing shopping in online not only as habit but also it a hobby for them. Nevertheless, there are numerous citizen their shopping habit only depend on mentality and situation. May be their not young or fashion coussious but they like to do shopping from outlet. Even, some like to do shopping in old age for making their like colourful. To highlight, in Bangladesh last year at ' Bashundara city' bumper shopping prize winner was a 65 years old lady. Therefore, shopping habit always not depend on age. In conclusion, though most of the shopping lovers are young and teenager but according to the mind setup it depend on situation too. However, as a shopping help to develop a country business. We all should try to attend it.
In this up-to-date era
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
fascination for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
increasing
tremendously
.
In that case
, several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
asserted that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
intention depend more on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
.
Mainly
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
also
believe that it depend on mentality and situation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, this essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the topic on the base of it.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, nowadays young nations are
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "going shipping".
doing shipping
more than senior citizen. As a repercussion fashion homes and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
mall are keeping, maintaining products more according to
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'choose' is correct. If 'choose' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the choose
of up-to-date generation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are more
Possible spelling mistake found.
habited
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
.
For example
, UAE well-known newspaper ' Gulf
Possible spelling mistake found.
News&
#039; published that Dubai Mall 60%-70% customers are under the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 18-25 years.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
mostly
depend on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
.
Moreover
, modern generation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a busy,
Possible spelling mistake found.
hestic
and charming lifestyle with new technology.
As a result
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
all over the world online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is increasing
rapidly
and their main target to attract the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
18-30 years.
For instance
, survey
A determiner is probably missing here: "of the USA".
of USA
' Fashion
Possible spelling mistake found.
Magazine&
#039; teenage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
in online not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it a hobby for them.

Nevertheless
, there are numerous
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "citizens"?
citizen
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
depend on mentality and situation.
Did you mean "maybe" (= perhaps)?
May be
their not young or fashion coussious
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they like to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
from outlet. Even,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
like to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for making their like
Possible spelling mistake. 'colourful' is British English.
colourful
. To highlight, in Bangladesh last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
at '
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bashundara
Possible spelling mistake found.
city&
#039; bumper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
prize winner was a 65 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
lady.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
always not depend on age.

In conclusion
, though most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
lovers are young and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
according to the mind setup it
Did you mean "depends"?
depend
on situation too.
However
, as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to develop a country business. We all should try to attend it.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Mistakes

IELTS essay People's shopping habits depend more on the age group they belong to than any other factors. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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