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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Young children should learn to draw or paint. Include details and examples to support your answer. v.70

Young children should learn to draw or paint. Include details and examples to support your answer. v. 70
Over the last few decades, remarkable advances have been made in the field of genetic engineering. Consequently, scientists now have the ability to manipulate genes for a range of purposes, from making improvements in agriculture to experimentation with human genes. The question, however, is whether there should be any limitations on this development. Is this essay, I shall examine both sides of the argument. Firstly, it is clear that genetic engineering has brought about certain benefits in terms of crop production. Now plants, for example, can produce more fruit more quickly. This achievement means that greater harvests are guaranteed, so that more people can be fed. As for the impact of genetic engineering on health care, advocates claim it could be used to cure a range of health-related problems, such as cystic fibrosis and Alzheimer's. Children and adults with these diseases endure terrible suffering, yet with gene therapy, there is a possibility of a better quality of life. Despite these advantages, there are some aspects of genetic engineering, which require ongoing consideration. Critics claim that genetically modified plants have little nutritional value and that they will lead to the eradication of weeds, which many insect species depend on. In the case of gene therapy, it is still uncertain how the alteration of one gene, even though it may be faulty, could affect the functions of the human body in the long term. In my opinion, the benefits of genetic engineering can outweigh the drawbacks, provided governments and scientists consider the consequences carefully, and put people before profit.
Over the last few decades, remarkable advances have
been made
in the field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
.
Consequently
, scientists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
have the ability to manipulate genes for a range of purposes, from making improvements in agriculture to experimentation with human genes. The question,
however
, is whether there should be any limitations on this development. Is this essay, I shall examine both sides of the argument.

Firstly
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
has brought about certain benefits in terms of crop production.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
plants,
for example
, can produce more fruit more
quickly
. This achievement means that greater harvests
are guaranteed
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
be fed
. As for the impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
on health care, advocates claim it could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to cure a range of health-related problems, such as cystic fibrosis and Alzheimer's. Children and adults with these diseases endure terrible suffering,
yet
with gene therapy, there is a possibility of a better quality of life.

Despite these advantages, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
aspects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
, which require ongoing consideration. Critics claim that
genetically
modified plants have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
nutritional value and that they will lead to the eradication of weeds, which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
insect species depend on. In the case of gene therapy, it is
still
uncertain how the alteration of one gene,
even though
it may be faulty, could affect the functions of the human body in the long term.

In my opinion, the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
can outweigh the drawbacks, provided
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and scientists consider the consequences
carefully
, and put
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
profit.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay Young children should learn to draw or paint. Include details and examples to support your answer. v. 70

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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