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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In order to be well-informed, a person must get information from many different news resources. v.414

In order to be well-informed, a person must get information from many different news resources. v. 414
In the contemporary world, there are plenty of sophisticated technology that provides various of information, and will help the vast majority of people to receive most different resources to fulfil their curiosity. However, I personally believe that it is more effective to extend their insight instead of one source. There are several reasons of every person should know many information from more than one side. First and foremost, it enables everyone to get the whole picture, then they will probably clarify all of them, which is the right and accurate news to confirm. Getting only one news from one perspective that is not extremely true, for instance, it will be seriously misleading to suggest the view of its object. Furthermore, it is not only for enriching the insight, but also improving data quality for each individual. By means, the myriad of information will improve the way of people in analysing the kind of its data and understanding it. On the other hand, the experience of the respondents is having a great opportunity to extinguish between the false and true news. This kind of skill is truly needed to assure that the person is truly knowing the right things. Besides, the other skills such as detecting the deception of information will be automatically recognized, if the person prefers to read more different data. Thus, everyone could figure out the wrong media in providing the information in this modern era. By way of conclusion, although, there are sophisticated media that could be trusted, yet every person must be careful in getting it by reading the various data. As I would state that knowing different kind of information will also improve the skill of individual in reading news from other sources.
In the contemporary world, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of sophisticated technology that provides various of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the vast majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to receive most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
resources to fulfil their curiosity.
However
, I
personally
believe that it is more effective to extend their insight
instead
of one source.

There are several reasons of every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
should know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
from more than one side.
First
and foremost, it enables everyone to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the whole picture, then they will
probably
clarify all of them, which is the right and accurate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
to confirm. Getting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
from one perspective
that is
not
extremely
true,
for instance
, it will be
seriously
misleading to suggest the view of its object.
Furthermore
, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for enriching the insight,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
quality for each individual. By means, the myriad of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the way of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysing' is British English.
analysing
the kind of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
and understanding it.

On the other hand
, the experience of the respondents is having a great opportunity to extinguish between the false and true
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. This kind of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
is
truly
needed to assure that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is
truly
knowing the right things.
Besides
, the other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as detecting the deception of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
will be
automatically
recognized, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
prefers to read more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
.
Thus
, everyone could figure out the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
media in providing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
in this modern era.

By way of conclusion, although, there
are sophisticated
media that could
be trusted
,
yet
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be careful in getting it by reading the various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
data
.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
I would state that knowing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
of individual in reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
from other sources.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay In order to be well-informed, a person must get information from many different news resources. v. 414

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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