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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It’s better to have rules about the type of clothing that people wear at schools or in their workplace. v.243

It’s better to have rules about the type of clothing that people wear at schools or in their workplace. v. 243
It is believed by certain individuals that engaging in activities by collaborating with certain individuals increases their mental capacity and I completely agree with the idea. This essay will explain more in details. Firstly, group work is a vital aspect of learning because it creates a platform for the members to share ideas from their wealth of knowledge. There’s an adage which says ‘iron sharpeneth iron’. Hence, anyone who is a part of a cluster of knowledgeable people, becomes better than they ever were. For instance, back in my University days, I studied alone for my exams and I barely passed them. However, when I joined a study group, my marks sky-rocketed! Evidently, I was able to acquire more knowledge from my colleagues with whom I studied. Furthermore, working alone does more harm than good to anyone because, it narrows the mind. Such person is deceived into believing they are the best at what they do, while unfortunately, they are performing woeful because they are unable to identify their mistakes. However, getting engaged with a number of people to learn in their midst, helps to amend mistakes, unlearn the wrong things, that they've had learnt prior and widen their horizon. For example, Albert Einstein was able to succeed at his invention of the electricity when he decided to involve more people in his experiment after several failed attempts. In conclusion, performing activities together as a group has a lot of benefits to every member, even though, some brilliant members might feel they are being slowed down. The fact that mental acumen is improved, however, is golden and should be encouraged.
It
is believed
by certain individuals that engaging in activities by collaborating with certain individuals increases their mental capacity and I completely
agree
with the
idea
. This essay will
explain
more in
details
.

Firstly
, group work is a vital aspect of learning
because
it creates a platform for the members to share
ideas
from their wealth of knowledge. There’s an adage which says ‘iron
sharpeneth
iron’.
Hence
, anyone who is a part of a cluster of knowledgeable
people
, becomes better than they ever were.
For instance
, back in my University days, I studied alone for my exams and I
barely
passed them.
However
, when I
joined
a study group, my marks sky-rocketed!
Evidently
, I was able to acquire more knowledge from my colleagues with whom I studied.

Furthermore
, working alone does more harm than
good
to anyone
because
, it narrows the mind. Such person
is deceived
into believing they are the best at what they do, while unfortunately, they are performing woeful
because
they are unable to identify their mistakes.
However
, getting engaged with a number of
people
to learn in their midst,
helps
to amend mistakes, unlearn the
wrong
things, that they've had
learnt
prior and widen their horizon.
For example
, Albert Einstein was able to succeed at his invention of the electricity when he decided to involve more
people
in his experiment after several failed attempts.

In conclusion
, performing activities together as a group has
a lot of
benefits to every member,
even though
,
some
brilliant members might feel they are
being slowed
down. The fact that mental acumen is
improved
,
however
, is golden and should
be encouraged
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay It’s better to have rules about the type of clothing that people wear at schools or in their workplace. v. 243

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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