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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The food we eat today is much healthier than in the past. v.24

The food we eat today is much healthier than in the past. v. 24
The effects of the increasing popularity of online business which was always debatable have now become more controversial. The substantial influence in the growth of electronic shopping has sparked the controversy over the potential impact of these trends in the closure of local shops in recent years. I completely agree with this statement and this essay will elaborate on how the rise in online shopping has a negative effect on local shops with valid arguments and examples. At the outset, there are numerous reasons why an e-shopping has been popular nowadays among the buyers, but the most conspicuous stems from the fact that because of the fierce competition. Mostly, the virtual shopping company uses a user-friendly mobile app and the websites with fascinating discounts and coupon codes to attract the customers towards their business. If online shops continue to do this, then local shops are no longer able to survive in the market place due to the extreme rivalry. Hence, major virtual shopping retailers’ such as ICONIC uses more discounts to drag customers from the physical shop. Another key justification is to termination of the local shopping malls by online shopping is because it provides convenience. For example, as a majority of online shopping retailers use the free delivery system to deliver their products to customer doorsteps, a consumer will increasingly move with cyber shopping as it provides time-saving and convenience. Furthermore, as electronic shopping uses a wide range of marketing tools and web features to show their products to their target market with less time, buyers will not get tired up. Therefore, 90% of e-shopping websites use free delivery channels and web features to provide easiness to their clients. From what has been discussed above, it can be concluded that the e-shopping has become prominent in the 21st century and rise in online shopping leads to closure of local shops and shopping malls in the near future. I completely agree with this statement because of the reasons such as rising competition and convenience.
The effects of the increasing popularity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
business which was always debatable have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
become more controversial. The substantial influence in the growth of electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has sparked the controversy over the potential impact of these trends in the closure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
in recent years. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement and this essay will elaborate on how the rise in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
with valid arguments and examples.

At the outset, there are numerous reasons why an e-shopping has been popular nowadays among the buyers,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the most conspicuous stems from the fact that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the fierce competition.
Mostly
, the virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
a user-friendly mobile app and the websites with fascinating discounts and coupon codes to attract the customers towards their business. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
continue to do this, then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
are no longer able to survive in the market place due to the extreme rivalry.
Hence
, major virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
retailers’ such as ICONIC
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
more discounts to drag customers from the physical shop.

Another key justification is to termination of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
malls by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it provides convenience.
For example
, as a majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
retailers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
use
the free delivery system to deliver their products to customer doorsteps, a consumer will
increasingly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
with cyber
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
as it provides time-saving and convenience.
Furthermore
, as electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
a wide range of marketing tools and web features to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their products to their target market with less time, buyers will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
tired up.
Therefore
, 90% of e-shopping websites
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
use
free delivery channels and web features to provide easiness to their clients.

From what has
been discussed
above, it can
be concluded
that the e-shopping has become prominent in the 21st century and rise in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
leads to closure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
malls in the near future. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the reasons such as rising competition and convenience.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay The food we eat today is much healthier than in the past. v. 24

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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