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Do you agree of disagree. In order to be well informed, a person must get information from many different news sources. v.1

Do you agree of disagree. In order to be well informed, a person must get information from many different news sources. v. 1
Due to an increasing population in many countries the demand of infrastructure such as building houses is also rising. In many areas, to cope with the demand of houses, space availability for houses is merely in the rural region. Although some believe that it is more critical to safe the countryside by not building homes there, in my view, I disagree with this assertion and this essay will discuss reasons for it. To begin with, urban areas ought not to be further used for the infrastructure development. This is because they are already congested with the excessive number of houses, both traditional and apartment type. This, in turn, leads to no capacity of building any more houses in such region. A study from the World Housing Organization, for instance, showed that the capacity of building further homes in major cities all over the world is remaining only 8%. Furthermore, I believe that the rural region should be used for infrastructure development. The countryside has considerably vast area, thereby many homes can be built there, which could cater the shortage of homes for people by providing enough homes. Research, for example, indicates that 30% of the population of China who are facing no shelter problem can be accommodated in different rural regions in the country by constructing 5 million houses there. In conclusion, in many places, the rural region is the only option left to build homes. While some people opine that protecting countryside is more crucial than building homes there, in my opinion, I disagree since there is very less space left in urban regions to build homes and rural regions have the vast capacity to construct homes.
Due to an increasing population in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries the demand of infrastructure such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
is
also
rising. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
areas, to cope with the demand of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
, space availability for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
is
merely
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
region
. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that it is more critical to safe the countryside by not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
there, in my view, I disagree with this assertion and this essay will discuss reasons for it.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, urban areas ought not to be
further
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the infrastructure development. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are already congested with the excessive number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
, both traditional and apartment type. This, in turn, leads to no capacity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
any more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
region
. A study from the World Housing Organization,
for instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that the capacity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
in major cities all over the world is remaining
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
8%.

Furthermore
, I believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
region
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for infrastructure development. The countryside has
considerably
vast area, thereby
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
can
be built
there, which could cater the shortage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
by providing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
. Research,
for example
, indicates that 30% of the population of China who are facing no shelter problem can
be accommodated
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
in the country by constructing 5 million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
there.

In conclusion
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
places, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
region
is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
option
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
to build
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opine that protecting countryside is more crucial than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
there, in my opinion, I disagree since there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
less space
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
in urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
to build
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
have the vast capacity to construct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Do you agree of disagree. In order to be well informed, a person must get information from many different news sources. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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