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Describe an object you particularly like. You should say: What it is and what it looks likeWhat it is made ofWhat it is forAnd explain why it is special for you v.2

Describe an object you particularly like. You should say: What it is and what it looks likeWhat it is made ofWhat it is forAnd explain why it is special for you v. 2
These days, there is an upward trend among the people to purchase posh and expensive items created by prominent brands. Certainly, it happens due to definite reasons. From my point of view, this tendency negatively affects society by spreading materialism. Firstly, I believe that a growing number of advertisements have influenced society’s needs in well-known brands. Clearly, commercials have overloaded our lives, they appear to be everywhere: in the streets, in social media and on the TV. Therefore, there is a direct correlation between these two patterns. Consumers feel the constant need of buying anytime they see an appealing advertisement. Secondly, by acquiring famous brands people tend to show their wealth and status. Since luxurious items praise to the skies their owner, it is expected that with more things person will receive more respect. In my view, people’s increased need in famous brands has a detrimental impact on society. This tendency affects various age groups and results in misbehaviour and immorality of individuals. A prime example is a “rich kids” phenomenon. Growing in affluent families and having everything they desire, youth became self-confident and arrogant. They are bent only on materialism and forget about the inner world importance, more precisely intelligence, politeness and generality. In addition, luxurious items usually became a ground for conflicts and the person not owning them may became a victim of bullying or discrimination. For instance, many restaurants judge their clients by the appearance. The dress code availability might lead to denial of service, which, I believe, is absolutely unacceptable in today's world. In conclusion, I want to say, it is correctly considered, that money cannot buy happiness. Similarly, a pair of posh sneakers won't give an appreciation and respect people desire. Materialism causes certain issues and the impact of it is adverse.
These days, there is an upward trend among the
people
to
purchase
posh and expensive items created by prominent
brands
.
Certainly
, it happens due to
definite
reasons. From my point of view, this tendency
negatively
affects society by spreading materialism.

Firstly
, I believe that a growing number of advertisements have influenced society’s needs in well-known
brands
.
Clearly
, commercials have overloaded our
lives
, they appear to be everywhere: in the streets, in social media and on the TV.
Therefore
, there is a direct correlation between these two patterns. Consumers feel the constant need of buying anytime they
see
an appealing advertisement.
Secondly
, by acquiring
famous
brands
people
tend to
show
their wealth and status. Since luxurious items praise to the skies their owner, it is
expected
that with more
things
person will receive more respect.

In my view,
people’s
increased need in
famous
brands
has a detrimental impact on society. This tendency affects various age groups and results in
misbehaviour
and immorality of individuals. A prime example is a “rich kids” phenomenon. Growing in affluent families and having everything they desire, youth became self-confident and arrogant. They
are bent
only
on materialism and forget about the inner world importance, more
precisely
intelligence, politeness and generality.
In addition
, luxurious items
usually
became a ground for conflicts and the person not owning them may
became
a victim of bullying or discrimination.
For instance
,
many
restaurants judge their clients by the appearance. The dress code availability might lead to denial of service, which, I believe, is
absolutely
unacceptable in
today
's world.

In conclusion
, I want to say, it is
correctly
considered, that money cannot
buy
happiness.
Similarly
, a pair of posh sneakers won't give an appreciation and respect
people
desire. Materialism causes certain issues and the impact of it is adverse.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Describe an object you particularly like. You should say: What it is and what it looks likeWhat it is made ofWhat it is forAnd explain why it is special for you v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
297 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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