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Describe an intelligent person you knowYou should say: who this person iswhen and where you first met themwhat kind of person they areand explain why you think this person is intelligent v.1

Describe an intelligent person you knowYou should say: who this person iswhen and where you first met themwhat kind of person they areand explain why you think this person is intelligent v. 1
Some people argue that accessing to university is a right of all people no matter poor or rich and government should provide the opportunity for all people to study free in university. However, I believe free educating is a right of all people without regard to their financial background, but it cannot be practical for government. On the one hand, it is true that all people should have a right to access to university and educating during their life because high educating people have a more chance to employ, since nowadays more jobs require knowledge and skills. For example, for getting a high level of jobs and well-paid careers such as doctor, lawyer and engineer need to study in university. As a result, without such founding poor section of society would be perpetuated and society as a whole would suffer; therefore, low income background would not have an opportunity to develop their talent and level of life. On the other hand, it is reasonable providing free university for all people poor or reach is not practical for government no matter they are wealthy or not due to the fact that universities need invest and source of revenue for providing many aspects such as books and facilities, so that earn this budget from student. Consequently, government does not have enough budget for free university; besides, reach people for attending to university do not need to give fund from government because they can pay their tuition; government cannot pay money for the rich as well as the poor, so the national budget of government is better to support other aspects of society such as health care and the environment. In conclusion, I believe, although attending to university is a right of all people poor or rich, but it is not necessary government support all people in society because it is not practical.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that accessing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
no matter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
or rich and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should provide the opportunity for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
However
, I believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
educating is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
without regard to their financial background,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it cannot be practical for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

On the one hand, it is true that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
to access to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
and educating during their life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
high educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a more chance to employ, since nowadays more jobs require knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For example
, for getting a high level of jobs and well-paid careers such as doctor, lawyer and engineer need to study in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
As a result
, without such founding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
section of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
would
be perpetuated
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
as a whole would suffer;
therefore
, low income background would not have an opportunity to develop their talent and level of life.

On the other hand
, it is reasonable providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
or reach is not practical for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
no matter they are wealthy or not due to the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
need invest and source of revenue for providing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects such as books and facilities,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that earn this budget from student.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
does not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
budget for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
;
besides
, reach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for attending to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
do not need to give fund from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can pay their tuition;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
cannot pay money for the rich
as well
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the national budget of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is better to support other aspects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
such as health care and the environment.

In conclusion
, I believe, although attending to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
or rich,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is not necessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
support all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is not practical.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Describe an intelligent person you knowYou should say: who this person iswhen and where you first met themwhat kind of person they areand explain why you think this person is intelligent v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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