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Crime is a big problem in the world; many believe that nothing can be done to prevent it. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give your own opinion. v.1

Crime is a big problem in the world; many believe that nothing can be done to prevent it. Give your own opinion. v. 1
One of the most topical issues in modern society is the increasing number of criminals. That is because it is often said that criminal activity cannot remove from the world. I totally disagree with this view and in this essay, I will provide enough arguments to support my perspective. Generally speaking, there is a wide range of advantages, why people believe that longer imprisonment is really necessary to lessen the crime rates. Perhaps the main reason why people in favour of this trend is, that it will act as a warning by law that any antisocial and offence acts are intolerable and unacceptable. For instance, life imprisonment and capital punishment are pre-planned for murders and horrible assault eases. This will make people think several times before committing to a crime. In addition, longer prison will assure the community that bestiality will receive the highest degree of punishments and never be roamed in the public freely which will make the community free from offence. As a consequence, it ensures the less threat to the local from these anti-social elements. For example, a recent survey conducted in Dhaka, and it's clearly shown that awarding a longer judgment of 16 years for sexual assault, lead to decrease the sexual harassment cases. Crime is a consequence of the circumstance. Nobody is born a criminal. Society needs to observe deeply into the situation which gives rise the criminals and should try to block it. For instance, substandard is the main reason for a person to commit an offence. So, if the government ensures the basic needs of a person like a standard health care, housing and tertiary education, et Cetra of its' citizens, the incidents of robbery or any worsened antisocial activity will be decreased dramatically. In conclusion, this is a topic which raises some questions in contemporary life. Having considered both sides of the viewpoints I would argue that putting death sentences will make our society free from extreme offences. However, if we don't put the death penalty on violent crimes, people will engage in themselves with the world of crime.
One of the most topical issues in modern society is the increasing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
.
That is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
said that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
activity cannot remove from the world. I
totally
disagree with this view and in this essay, I will provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
arguments to support my perspective.

Generally
speaking, there is a wide range of advantages, why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that longer imprisonment is
really
necessary to lessen the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates. Perhaps the main reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of this trend is, that it will act as a warning by law that any antisocial and
Possible spelling mistake. 'offence' is British English.
offence
acts are intolerable and unacceptable.
For instance
, life imprisonment and capital punishment are
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-planned
for murders and horrible assault
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eases
. This will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
several times
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
committing to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
In addition
, longer prison will assure the community that bestiality will receive the highest degree of punishments and never
be roamed
in the public
freely
which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the community free from
Possible spelling mistake. 'offence' is British English.
offence
. As a consequence, it ensures the less threat to the local from these anti-social elements.
For example
, a recent survey conducted in Dhaka, and it's
clearly
shown that awarding a longer judgment of 16 years for sexual assault, lead to decrease the sexual harassment cases.

Crime is a consequence of the circumstance. Nobody
is born
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
. Society needs to observe
deeply
into the situation which gives rise the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
and should try to block it.
For instance
, substandard is the main reason for a person to commit an
Possible spelling mistake. 'offence' is British English.
offence
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
ensures the basic needs of a person like a standard health care, housing and tertiary education,
Possible spelling mistake found.
et
Possible spelling mistake found.
Cetra
of
An apostrophe is never used to form possessive case pronouns. Did you mean: "its"?
its'
citizens, the incidents of robbery or any worsened antisocial activity will
be decreased
dramatically
.

In conclusion
, this is a topic which raises
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
questions in contemporary life. Having considered both sides of the viewpoints I would argue that putting death sentences will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our society free from extreme
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
.
However
, if we don't put the death penalty on violent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will engage in themselves with the world of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Language is to the mind more than light is to the eye.
William Gibson

IELTS essay Crime is a big problem in the world; many believe that nothing can be done to prevent it. Give your own opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
347 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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