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Cricket has become more popular than the national sports in the sub-continental countries. What do you think are the reasons behind this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience v.1

Cricket has become more popular than the national sports in the sub-continental countries. What do you think are the reasons behind this? 1
Cricket is a game which is been followed by million of people around the world. It is very popular in some of the sub-continental countries like India. In India, cricket is given more importance than hockey, which is the national sports. In this essay, I will highlight the various reasons why cricket is more popular than the national sports in some countries. The most significant reason is that the sports authorities of certain countries give more budget for cricket and hence there are more facilities for cricket than the national sports. If certain people are interested in any other sports in such countries, then they would not find many playgrounds in their areas or cities. Another contributing factor is that the media supports cricket more than the national sports. Also, people prefer playing cricket as its easier and requires less stamina as compared to the national sports like football, hockey etc. For instance, I had a friend in Bangalore, India, who was interested in football. Although he couldn’t practice on a daily basis as the football ground was very far from his house. Furthermore, there are better coaches available in the field of cricket in such countries as compared to the coaches in the national sports. The last interesting reason is that cricket is supported through generations i. e. the father would teach his son about cricket and hence the national sports is never taught to the young children. For example, my father taught me cricket as he knew only that really well. In conclusion, cricket is a popular sport in certain sub-continental countries and thus the support for national sports in these countries is fading away. There are various reasons for why this is happening. However, there is a need for people to understand and encourage the national sports because there will be a time when some really good sports will not exist in the near future.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cricket
is a game which
is been
followed by million of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around the world. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular in
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
sub-continental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like India. In India,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
more importance than hockey, which is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. In this essay, I will highlight the various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
is more popular than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries.

The most significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
authorities of certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
give more budget for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
and
hence
there are more facilities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. If certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are interested
in any other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, then they would not find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
playgrounds in their areas or cities. Another contributing factor is that the media supports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
as its easier and requires less stamina as compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
like football, hockey etc.
For instance
, I had a friend in Bangalore, India, who
was interested
in football. Although he couldn’t practice on a daily basis as the football ground was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
far from his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.

Furthermore
, there are better coaches available in the field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
as compared to the coaches in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. The last interesting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
is supported
through generations
There should be no space here: "i.e.".
i. e.
the father would teach his son about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
and
hence
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is never taught to the young children.
For example
, my father taught me
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
as he knew
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
that
really
well.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
is a popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
in certain sub-continental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and
thus
the support for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is fading away. There are various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
for why this is happening.
However
, there is a need for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to understand and encourage the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there will be a time when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
will not exist in the near future.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
48Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Cricket has become more popular than the national sports in the sub-continental countries. What do you think are the reasons behind this? 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
318 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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