Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Cricket has become more popular than the national sports in many subcontinental countries. What do you think the reason behind this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.1

Cricket has become more popular than the national sports in many subcontinental countries. What do you think the reason behind this? v. 1
Undoubtedly, it would not be an exaggeration if we call cricket the most popular game in sub-continental countries because there is hardly any part in this region where cricket is not played and relished. Though every nation has its national sport like hockey in India, football in Brazil, yet cricket is gaining exceeding popularity especially in sub-continental countries; hereby, I will throw light on some of the possible reasons behind this phenomenon. The predominant reason, why it became so popular among sub-continental nations is that the cricket was introduced in these countries by the British during the colonial period; so, every country became familiar with the rules and regulations of this game. Moreover, these developing nations tend to imitate the western culture, whether it is a style, language and sport. Mushrooming importance of English language worldwide is a convincing evidence of the fact that whatever was introduced by the English in their occupied countries still continue to be flourished. Moving further, the sports like hockey, football and so on have limited international tournaments, whereas cricket has various events like ICC Cricket World Cup, Ashes Series, ICC World Twenty-20 and many more. Therefore, cricket gets a lot more media coverage than any other national game. As a result, everyone has a special affinity towards cricket and cricketers as well, especially youngsters who have a profound passion for this sport. To recapitulate, above presented arguments clarify the fact that Cricket dominates the sports world, particularly in countries like India, Bangladesh, Pakistan, Sri Lanka and Nepal, which have gone through the influence of English culture during the English colonial era and where this sport is considered a part of national pride.
Undoubtedly
, it would not be an exaggeration if we call
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
the most popular game in sub-continental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there is hardly any part in this region where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
is not played and relished. Though every nation has its national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
like hockey in India, football in Brazil,
yet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
is gaining exceeding popularity
especially
in sub-continental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
; hereby, I will throw light on
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
possible reasons behind this phenomenon.

The predominant reason, why it became
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
popular among sub-continental nations is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
was introduced
in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
by the British during the colonial period;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
became familiar with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations of this game.
Moreover
, these developing nations tend to imitate the western culture, whether it is a style, language and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
. Mushrooming importance of English language worldwide is a convincing evidence of the fact that whatever
was introduced
by the English in their occupied
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
still
continue to
be flourished
.

Moving
further
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
like hockey, football and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on have limited international tournaments, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
has various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
like ICC
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cricket
World Cup, Ashes Series, ICC World Twenty-20 and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
a lot more media coverage than any other national game.
As a result
, everyone has a special affinity towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cricket
and cricketers
as well
,
especially
youngsters who have a profound passion for this sport.

To recapitulate, above presented arguments clarify the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cricket
dominates the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
world,
particularly
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like India, Bangladesh, Pakistan, Sri Lanka and Nepal, which have gone through the influence of English culture during the English colonial era and where this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
is considered
a part of national pride.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Language is to the mind more than light is to the eye.
William Gibson

IELTS essay Cricket has become more popular than the national sports in many subcontinental countries. What do you think the reason behind this? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts