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Creative artists should always have the freedom to express their ideas in any way they wish. The government should not restrict what they do. To what extent do you agree with this opinion. v.1

Creative artists should always have the freedom to express their ideas in any way they wish. The government should not restrict what they do. v. 1
Artists should be able to have the liberty to express their opinions without too many restrictions on them, otherwise the country can no longer develop as there wouldn't be anyone else to question the thoughts and opinions of others. But then again, some restrictions are needed to be placed on them to avoid unnecessary conflicts and protect others who would be affected by this. Firstly, artists should have the right to be able to express their ideas and opinions, and only then is the country going to move forward. They are needed in the society to question and put forth alternative ways of approaching a certain situation, which is very much in need, so that people in general wouldn't just follow trends or go along with with other's thoughts solely because they are popular, instead they would start to think on their own too. For example, Charles Dickens and Victor Hugo have questioned and opposed against the England and France government respectively which helped the nations to move forward. On contrary, some restrictions are needed to avoid conflict. For artists, while expressing what they think is right, sometimes their ideas can be hurtful to a group of people, big or small. Moreover, the opinions of the public can be very much be influenced by what the artists, the ones that they look up to, put out, which in some situations can be extremely harmful. For instance, if an artist expresses himself or herself on the topic of racism in a way that it's hurtful to a minority, this would likely lead to a conflict. In conclusion, artists should be given the freedom to give their own opinions, thoughts and ideas but along with the artistic freedom given, restrictions are required too. When that liberty is taken away to a great extent, the society wouldn't progress ahead, that being said, if there are no rules and regulations that are needed to be followed by them, the world would be in shambles.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Artists
should be able to have the liberty to express their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opinions
without too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
restrictions
on them,
otherwise
the country can no longer develop as there wouldn't be anyone else to question the thoughts and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opinions
of others.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
then again,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
restrictions
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
to
be placed
on them to avoid unnecessary conflicts and protect others who would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by this.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
should have the right to be able to express their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opinions
, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
then is the country going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
forward. They are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
in the society to question and put forth alternative ways of approaching a certain situation, which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much in need,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in general
wouldn't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
follow trends or go along
Possible typo: you repeated a word
with with
other's thoughts
solely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are popular,
instead
they would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
too.
For example
, Charles Dickens and Victor Hugo have questioned and opposed against the England and France
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
respectively
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
the nations to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
forward.

On contrary,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
restrictions
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
to avoid conflict. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
, while expressing what they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
is right,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
can be hurtful to a group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opinions
of the public can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much
be influenced
by what the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
, the ones that they look up to, put out, which in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
situations can be
extremely
harmful.
For instance
, if an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artist
expresses himself or herself on the topic of racism in a way that it's hurtful to a minority, this would likely lead to a conflict.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the freedom to give their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opinions
, thoughts and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
along with the artistic freedom
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
restrictions
are required
too. When that liberty
is taken
away to a great extent, the society wouldn't progress ahead, that
being said
, if there are no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations that are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
to
be followed
by them, the world would be in shambles.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Creative artists should always have the freedom to express their ideas in any way they wish. The government should not restrict what they do. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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