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Countries becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? v.1

Countries becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? v. 1
It has always been a debatable issue which century has a better life? While some argue that previous centuries have, I agree with those who believe that the 21st centuries have due to two ways. In 21st centuries the life of people has transformed due to the advancement in technology. Nowadays, most people have a mobile phone in their pocket with access to the internet and get any information on just a single click, whereas, earlier many people used to get information through newspapers or radio only. Moreover, with the help of such cutting-edge technology, it has become easy for most users to perform online transactions related to banking, shopping and booking movie or travel ticket, however, compared to last century it was tedious as well as intricate job. For instance, if any person wants to book the movie ticket for the late-night show, they can just click on the website of the theatre and book the ticket within few minutes without going there and standing in the queue. The foremost change it has been observed is in the infrastructure. Earlier, many passengers could find it difficult to travel from one city to another due to the poor infrastructure of roads. As a result, they could not opt the medium of the road for a longer journey. Nowadays, the government has built national highways all over the cities so that the citizen of the nation could travel easily and reach on time at a particular destination. Furthermore, there is a lot of improvement in airways connectivity. A few years back, it was not affordable for a normal individual to travel abroad due to the high cost of air ticket, which was 2 years of salary. These days, due to greater connectivity it has become affordable to the pocket of the middle class to travel out of the country for vacation. In conclusion, not only does the internet help us to access any information anytime and anywhere at just a single click, but also better infrastructure has improved our lives in the form of travelling abroad via aeroplane. Therefore, on balance, I believe life has changed a lot compared to earlier.
It has always been a debatable issue which century has a better life? While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
argue that previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
centuries
have, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with those who believe that the 21st
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
centuries
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to two ways.

In 21st
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
centuries
the life of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
has transformed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the advancement in technology. Nowadays, most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have a mobile phone in their pocket with access to the internet and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
any information on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a single click, whereas, earlier
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
information through newspapers or radio
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.
Moreover
, with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of such cutting-edge technology, it has become easy for most users to perform online transactions related to banking, shopping and booking movie or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
,
however
, compared to last century it was tedious
as well
as intricate job.
For instance
, if any person wants to book the movie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
for the late-night
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
, they can
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
click on the website of the
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
and book the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
within few minutes without going there and standing in the queue.

The foremost
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
it has
been observed
is in the infrastructure. Earlier,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
passengers could find it difficult to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
from one city to another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the poor infrastructure of roads.
As a result
, they could not opt the medium of the road for a longer journey. Nowadays, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has built national highways all over the cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the citizen of the nation could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
easily
and reach on time at a particular destination.
Furthermore
, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
improvement in airways connectivity. A few years back, it was not affordable for a normal individual to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
abroad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the high cost of air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
, which was 2 years of salary. These days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to greater connectivity it has become affordable to the pocket of the middle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
out of the country for vacation.

In conclusion
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
does the internet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to access any information anytime and anywhere at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a single click,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
better infrastructure has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in the form of travelling abroad via
Possible spelling mistake. 'aeroplane' is British English.
aeroplane
.
Therefore
, on balance, I believe life has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
a lot compared to earlier.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Countries becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
360 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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