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Computer Technology is getting cheaper and so it is likely that adults will be working from home and children will study from home. Is it a positive or negative development? v.2

Computer Technology is getting cheaper and so it is likely that adults will be working from home and children will study from home. Is it a positive or negative development? v. 2
This is the era of science and technology and everything is changing quite rapidly. With all the advancements in technology, we can now access any information by sitting at our place be it educational material or have to meet someone with business motives. This is a humongous achievement which helped people in enormous ways, few of which I will try to explain further. This technical advancement played a positive role in the field of education. Distant learning is one of the major achievement of this change. Previously, when anyone opt to go for specialization in any field, he or she had to travel miles in order to get required education. Whereas, in current times, via online distant learning programs, things become easily available on one clink. Which eventually saves time, money and efforts at the same time. Same is the case with job market where resource optimization is new and most happening thing. With growing technology, more and more people are now inclined towards e-commerce business and creating online jobs, thus saving their cost of offices and utilities. Additionally, companies are also promoting culture of flexible working where they are asking employees to work from their home in order to achieve resource optimization. In continuation to this, by offering home based jobs over internet, we can encourage the house wives to contribute in their country’s economy. To recapitulate, I must say that change is always good when it creates ease in the life of people. By making education and work accessible for every individual at their own space will benefit companies as well as employees.
This is the era of science and technology and everything is changing quite
rapidly
. With all the advancements in technology, we can
now
access any information by sitting at our place be it educational material or
have to
meet
someone with business motives. This is a humongous achievement which
helped
people
in enormous ways, few of which I will try to
explain
further
.

This technical advancement played a
positive
role in the field of education. Distant learning is one of the major achievement of this
change
. Previously, when anyone
opt
to go for specialization in any field, he or she had to travel miles in order to
get
required education. Whereas, in
current
times, via online distant learning programs, things become
easily
available on one clink. Which
eventually
saves time, money and efforts at the same time.

Same is the case with job market where resource optimization is new and most happening thing. With growing technology, more and more
people
are
now
inclined towards e-commerce business and creating online jobs,
thus
saving their cost of offices and utilities.
Additionally
,
companies
are
also
promoting culture of flexible working where they are asking employees to work from their home in order to achieve resource optimization. In continuation to this, by offering home based jobs over internet, we can encourage the
house
wives to contribute in their country’s economy.

To recapitulate, I
must
say that
change
is always
good
when it creates
ease
in the life of
people
. By making education and work accessible for every individual at their
own
space will benefit
companies
as well
as employees.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
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Virginia Woolf

IELTS essay Computer Technology is getting cheaper and so it is likely that adults will be working from home and children will study from home. Is it a positive or negative development? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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