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Cities around the world are continuing to expand as people leave the countryside. Some people prefer to live the city, while other like to live in the countryside. Discuss both views. v.2

Cities around the world are continuing to expand as people leave the countryside. Some people prefer to live the city, while other like to live in the countryside. v. 2
It is true that as a result of people's exodus from villages to cities, the latter expand in a starling pace in order to cater for such an unrivalled increase in numbers of population. While certain individuals opt for living in towns because this offers them better education, others prefer countryside thanks to its healthy environment. On the one hand, it is perfectly reasonable for some to prefer living in urban regions. This is primarily because living over there offers them an arena in which they can have access to better education. In fact, the vast majority of the renowned educational facilities, from different tiers, are located in the heart of cities, and therefore, being close to them saves time, effort and expenses. For instance, recent British survey found that almost 10, 000 citizen immigrated from agrarian societies to London in 2004, and 75% of them have clearly stated that settling down near-by Toronto's schools and universities is extremely convenient. On the other hand, a large cross-section of people favor living in rural areas. They believe that villages provide them with healthy environment, which is suitable for raising up their children. As countryside is teeming with spacious green areas which work as a natural lung that refines the atmosphere from virulent substances such as CO2, H2S and lead, this plays a significant role when it comes to bringing up intact children without worrying about them to be afflicted with respiratory diseases such as pneumonia and asthma. For example, WHO recommends living in villages due to the mild level air contamination. In conclusion, whether living in rural or urban areas is better is certainly a contentious debate. Although dwelling in cities facilitates better learning opportunities, residing in villages is more beneficial for children's health.
It is true that
as a result
of
people
's exodus from
villages
to cities, the latter expand in a starling pace in order to cater for such an unrivalled increase in numbers of population. While certain individuals opt for
living
in towns
because
this offers them
better
education, others prefer countryside thanks to its healthy environment.

On the one hand, it is
perfectly
reasonable for
some
to prefer
living
in urban regions. This is
primarily
because
living
over there offers them an arena in which they can have access to
better
education. In fact, the vast majority of the renowned educational facilities, from
different
tiers,
are located
in the heart of cities, and
therefore
, being close to them saves time, effort and expenses.
For instance
, recent British survey found that almost 10, 000
citizen
immigrated from agrarian societies to London in 2004, and 75% of them have
clearly
stated that settling down near-by Toronto's schools and universities is
extremely
convenient.

On the other hand
, a large cross-section of
people
favor
living
in rural areas. They believe that
villages
provide them with healthy environment, which is suitable for raising up their children. As countryside is teeming with spacious green areas which work as a natural lung that refines the atmosphere from virulent substances such as CO2, H2S and lead, this plays a significant role when it
comes
to bringing up intact children without worrying about them to
be afflicted
with respiratory diseases such as pneumonia and asthma.
For example
, WHO recommends
living
in
villages
due to the mild level air contamination.

In conclusion
, whether
living
in rural or urban areas is
better
is
certainly
a contentious debate. Although dwelling in cities facilitates
better
learning opportunities, residing in
villages
is more beneficial for children's health.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Cities around the world are continuing to expand as people leave the countryside. Some people prefer to live the city, while other like to live in the countryside. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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