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Children should begin learning a foreign language as soon as they start school. v.2

Children should begin learning a foreign language as soon as they start school. v. 2
Language is the best means of communication. In the modern globalisation era, it is not enough to be able to speak one language to communicate with the outside world. I strongly support the idea that children should begin learning a foreign language as soon as they start school. They faster become familiar with a strange language, improve their hearing ability to understand new words as time goes by and learn new words. In the following paragraphs, I will list some reasons to support my position. First of all, if one wants to see outcome soon, one must start sooner. So, the early children begin to learn a new language the better will be the result. Scientists say that a child does not confuse two different languages but learns them more effectively. If children learn a foreign language at an early age, then he/she can cope with the different cultures and enjoy a better position to read more books written in foreign language. Second, adults are often afraid to make mistakes when they are speaking in a new language. This fear is one of the biggest barriers for a person in his efforts to speak freely. Otherwise, children do not afraid of making grammatical mistakes because basically they just repeat words and sentences in the way they hear them. Also, children have a better chance to get rid of an accent. They faster get used to the right pronunciation and better feel the melody of a language. To sum up, I think that it is essential for children to begin learning a foreign language in their early ages. It brings many benefits such as great pronunciation. Also, it helps a child develop and gain more knowledge which is good for a long run.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Language
is the best means of communication. In the modern
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
era, it is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to be able to speak one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
to communicate with the outside world. I
strongly
support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
learning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
school. They faster become familiar with a strange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their hearing ability to understand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
words as time goes by and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
words. In the following paragraphs, I will list
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons to support my position.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, if one wants to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
outcome
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
sooner.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
will be the result. Scientists say that a child does not confuse two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learns
them more
effectively
. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
at an early age, then he/she can cope with the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures and enjoy a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
position to read more books written in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
language.

Second, adults are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
afraid to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
mistakes when they are speaking in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. This fear is one of the biggest barriers for a person in his efforts to speak
freely
.
Otherwise
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
do not afraid of making grammatical mistakes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
basically
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
repeat words and sentences in the way they hear them.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of an accent. They faster
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to the right pronunciation and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
feel the melody of a language.

To sum up, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
learning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in their early ages. It brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits such as great pronunciation.
Also
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
a child develop and gain more knowledge which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for a long run.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
31Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Children should begin learning a foreign language as soon as they start school. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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