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Children in some parts of the world have less responsibility compared to children in the past. Some people think this as a positive change; however, others think of it as a negative change. What do you think? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words. v.2

Children in some parts of the world have less responsibility compared to children in the past. Some people think this as a positive change; however, others think of it as a negative change. What do you think? v. 2
The younger generation in today’s world is shouldered with fewer duties than in bygone days. Although, some denizen's believe it to be an optimistic trend, others consider it to be a pessimistic trend. This essay will argue the value of giving young person's commitments in order to build a successful future. On the one hand, in the modern world minors are not burdened with the duties or the urge to earn money to meet the necessities for their family members. Some parents consider it to be advantageous as in this way a child will be able to enjoy his or her childhood to the fullest free from the worldly worries. For example, a recent report in the UK shows that a happy childhood with no duties and tension plays a pivotal role in shaping the personality and potential. Moreover, parents have an opinion that children should focus more on their academic education and other co-curricular activities which will contribute to building their strong career rather than merely through performing tasks and duties. For instance, by getting a comprehensive education qualification a child will be able to get a high-quality job with a decent salary. On the other hand,  not teaching young ones the need and importance of responsible behaviour will eventually lead to a laid-back attitude. They will not be aware of the harsh realities of the world, nor will they have a seriousness towards anything. To illustrate, if children are spoon fed from the beginning, they will neither have the value for money nor the zeal to work hard to earn that money. Furthermore, without inculcating a sense of responsibility or teaching the difference between good and bad behaviour, the younger ones will go in the wrong direction or will get into the wrong company. For example, in the USA more than 25% of adolescents become drug addicts as they are not taught to be responsible at an earlier stage. To conclude, I strongly believe that juveniles must be made accountable for their actions to ensure responsible behaviour in the future. Undoubtedly, this will help them to excel economically, socially, financially and ethically in the future.
The younger generation in
today
’s world
is shouldered
with fewer
duties
than in bygone days. Although,
some
denizen's
believe it to be an optimistic trend, others consider it to be a pessimistic trend. This essay will argue the value of giving young person's commitments in order to build a successful future.

On the one hand, in the modern world minors are not burdened with the
duties
or the urge to earn money to
meet
the necessities for their family members.
Some
parents consider it to be advantageous as in this way a child will be able to enjoy
his or her
childhood to the fullest free from the worldly worries.
For example
, a recent report in the UK
shows
that a happy childhood with no
duties
and tension plays a pivotal role in shaping the personality and potential.
Moreover
, parents have an opinion that children should focus more on their academic education and other co-curricular activities which will contribute to building their strong career
rather
than
merely
through performing tasks and
duties
.
For instance
, by getting a comprehensive education qualification a child will be able to
get
a high-quality job with a decent salary.

On the other hand
,
 
not teaching young
ones
the need and importance of responsible
behaviour
will
eventually
lead to a laid-back attitude. They will not be aware of the harsh realities of the world, nor will they have a seriousness towards anything. To illustrate, if children are
spoon fed
from the beginning, they will neither have the value for money nor the zeal to work
hard
to earn that money.
Furthermore
, without inculcating a sense of responsibility or teaching the difference between
good
and
bad
behaviour
, the younger
ones
will go in the
wrong
direction or will
get
into the
wrong
company
.
For example
, in the USA more than 25% of adolescents become drug addicts as they are not taught to be responsible at an earlier stage.

To conclude
, I
strongly
believe that juveniles
must
be made
accountable for their actions to ensure responsible
behaviour
in the future.
Undoubtedly
, this will
help
them to excel
economically
,
socially
,
financially
and
ethically
in the future.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Children in some parts of the world have less responsibility compared to children in the past. Some people think this as a positive change; however, others think of it as a negative change. What do you think? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
357 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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