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Would you prefer to live in a traditional house or in a modern apartmentbuilding? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice. v.1

Would you prefer to live in a traditional house or in a modern apartmentbuilding? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice. v. 1
Convenience food has been increasingly popular among in the modern world because it is easy to eat and easy to prepare. Especially in this day, many people do not have much hour to cook traditional meal and turn to eat prepackaged food, but others people believe that kind of cuisine are less nutrients. In my view, foods are very important for living of human, thus it's very important to eat a meal which has more nutrient. Traditional foods use a lot of time to prepare, therefore many people turn to find the foods which are more convenient to consume. This kind of foods is a good invention that makes them live longer, yet almost of them have not much essential nutrient of our body. This day we are a lot restaurant and you can buy foodstuff from them by not lose your time to prepare. For instance, near my workplace, there are many local restaurants, I usually order it from them and select the meal that do not spend much time to cook. It may take a while more than constant meals, but not much, more over it fresher than complete meal. Delicious taste is crucial, but it usually takes hours to prepare. Furthermore, frozen meal can just only make easy meal and usually reduce some ingredient that make it difficult to cook. As a result, it cannot make every kind of meal that we want to eat and may not well like fresh cuisine that make by traditional style. For instance, pizza from corner store are dumb and not crisp like the pizza that cook with conventional style. In conclusion, in the future, the latter may be dominated than the former because it's cheaper. But convenience food will not be instead traditional foodstuff due to nutrient and palatable taste.
Convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
has been
increasingly
popular among in the modern world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is easy to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
and easy to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prepare
.
Especially
in this day,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
hour to cook traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
and turn to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
prepackaged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that kind of cuisine are
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun nutrients is countable.
less
nutrients. In my view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for living of human,
thus
it's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
which has more nutrient.

Traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prepare
,
therefore
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
turn to find the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
which are more convenient to consume. This kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
invention that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer,
yet
almost of them have not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
essential nutrient of our body. This day we are a lot restaurant and you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
foodstuff from them by not lose your time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prepare
.
For instance
, near my workplace, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
local restaurants, I
usually
order it from them and select the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
that do not spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
time to cook. It may take a while more than constant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
, more over it fresher than complete meal.

Delicious taste is crucial,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
usually
takes hours to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prepare
.
Furthermore
, frozen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
can
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
and
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
ingredient that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
it difficult to cook.
As a result
, it cannot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
every kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
that we want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
and may not well like fresh cuisine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
by traditional style.
For instance
, pizza from corner store are dumb and not crisp like the pizza that cook with conventional style.

In conclusion
, in the future, the latter may
be dominated
than the former
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it's cheaper.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
convenience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
will not be
instead
traditional foodstuff due to nutrient and palatable taste.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay Would you prefer to live in a traditional house or in a modern apartmentbuilding? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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