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Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures? v.11

Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures? v. 11
It is often said that children are a future of any nation. Nowadays, heavy burden of study, communal and mercantile affects children's mental as well as physical development it is proved by world child health department. Every parent wishes for their child to be the best in every stream and not only compete with the province, but with a globe. Though, guardians send them to international schools where the weight of the school bag is heavier than kids even after school there are private tuition, though they don't have enough time to bloom their hidden talents and pursue their hobbies on weekends and that led them to stress. Some kids addicted to western culture by putting traditional culture beside and try to apply in their lives. For an instance, if they influence by electronic gadget they want their parents to purchase it at any cost either is required or not and if they unable to provide, they get an unnecessary load even some time and that makes them rebel against the rule laid by elders. Parenting plays a vital role to overcome these situations by realistic expectations and supporting them and creating mutual understanding with them for encouraging them to know their ability and be better in that field, they are really interested whether it is sports or extra curricular activity. Government should emphasis on digital education so no requirement of writing assignments. In conclusion, everyone must be aware and take necessary steps to protect childhood, or pressure will stifle the children's psychologically.
It is
often
said that children are a future of any nation. Nowadays, heavy burden of study, communal and mercantile affects children's mental
as well
as physical development it
is proved
by world child health department.

Every parent wishes for their child to be the best in every stream and not
only
compete with the province,
but
with a globe. Though, guardians
send
them to international schools where the weight of the school bag is heavier than kids even after school there are private tuition, though they don't have
enough
time to bloom their hidden talents and pursue their hobbies on weekends and that led them to
stress
.

Some
kids addicted to western culture by putting traditional culture beside and try to apply in their
lives
. For an instance, if they influence by electronic gadget they want their parents to
purchase
it at any cost either
is required
or not and if
they
unable to provide, they
get
an unnecessary load even
some
time and that
makes
them rebel against the
rule
laid by elders.

Parenting plays a vital role to overcome these situations by realistic expectations and supporting them and creating mutual understanding with them for encouraging them to know their ability and be better in that field, they are
really
interested whether it is sports or
extra curricular
activity.
Government
should
emphasis
on digital education
so
no requirement of writing assignments.

In conclusion
, everyone
must
be aware and take necessary steps to protect childhood, or pressure will stifle the children's
psychologically
.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures? v. 11

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
253 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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