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children and teenagers are committing more and more crimes in many countries. why is this happening. How can be stop this or least reduce this crime. v.2

children and teenagers are committing more and more crimes in many countries. why is this happening. How can be stop this or least reduce this crime. v. 2
It is well said that ' today ' s children are the future of tomorrow. Presently, the ratio of crime by juveniles and adults are increasing like a wild fire. Here, I would like to account it' s reasons along with it' s solutions. Manifold reasons are there behind this phenomenon. First and foremost, unemployment, inflation, are the main factor of this issue. To illustrate, number of young educated people more than the number of vaccancy and inflation is increasing day by day. Therefore, lack of jobs unemployed teenagers do crimes such as rovery, kidnapping, and many others in order to get money for two square meal. Apart from it, hectic schedule of parents also responsible. for example, both parent involved in work for bread and butter and they have not sufficient time for their juveniles. They are unable to provide them moral and social values and children watch crime programs on television in the absence of parents. As a result, lack of social and moral values stimulate children for crime. Numerous remedial measure are there to solve this worrying concern. Initially, administration try to reduce the inflation and confer employment to litterate young people so that they stay away from crime. Further, parents must nourish their children with Supreme traits. People must be awared by the drawbacks of overpopulation which enhance the number of problems in society. To recapitulate, Undeniably, crime rate is the big issue. However, still believe that government and people should take join responsibility to nip this evil in the bud.
It is well said that '
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
' s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are the future of tomorrow.
Presently
, the ratio of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
by juveniles and adults are increasing like a
This word is normally spelled as one.
wild fire
. Here, I would like to account
Possible spelling mistake found.
it&
#039; s reasons along with
Possible spelling mistake found.
it&
#039; s solutions.

Manifold reasons are there behind this phenomenon.
First
and foremost, unemployment, inflation, are the main factor of this issue. To illustrate, number of young educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
more than the number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
vaccancy
and inflation is increasing day by day.
Therefore
, lack of jobs unemployed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
rovery
, kidnapping, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
others in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
money for two square meal. Apart from it, hectic schedule of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
also
responsible.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
for
example, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
involved in work for bread and
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
butter and
they have not sufficient time for their juveniles. They are unable to provide them moral and social values and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
programs on television in the absence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
As a result
, lack of social and moral values stimulate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
for crime.

Numerous remedial measure are there to solve this worrying concern.
Initially
, administration try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the inflation and confer employment to
Possible spelling mistake found.
litterate
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they stay away from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Further
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
nourish their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
with Supreme traits.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
Possible spelling mistake found.
awared
by the drawbacks of overpopulation which enhance the number of problems in society.

To recapitulate,
Undeniably
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate is the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
issue.
However
,
still
believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should take
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
responsibility to nip this evil in the bud.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay children and teenagers are committing more and more crimes in many countries. why is this happening. How can be stop this or least reduce this crime. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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