Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages and disadvantages. v.33

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages and disadvantages. v. 33
It is believed by some people that now young adults have a large population, but people polarised that the mix of young people and old masses is very essential for the government and the nation. In my opinion, it has merits and demerits which I explain in the subsequent paragraph. To begin with, the merits predominant one is young adults have a new ideas and new experience and their ability to bring about a necessary change in the thinking of the country also invent new items which are absolutely beneficial for the nation. Apart from this, adult individual is more reptile than old populace because they are healthier and their struggle, strength is longer rather than older people so they do industry for long hours due to which they industry in which company that obtain more profit for the younger workers. Therefore, young adults familiar with the technology such as many educational, medical and industrial field make a use of advanced but old person not familiar with the new technology since it is good for their future generations. Furthermore, old masses have a vast experience from a year of working which is crucial in the decision making, but young people have no more experience for works. Thereafter, if the young generation population incline, then they want jobs, but that time law has no vacancies due to which youth are unemployment and go in bad company. For example, in India youth do industry 70 percent. In conclusion, it is suggested by some of us that old people are more experienced for trial. In fact, new workers observe all information about older workers.
It
is believed
by
some
people
that
now
young
adults
have a large population,
but
people
polarised
that the mix of
young
people
and
old
masses is
very
essential for the
government
and the nation. In my opinion, it has merits and demerits which I
explain
in the subsequent paragraph.

To
begin
with, the merits predominant one is
young
adults
have a
new
ideas
and
new
experience and their ability to bring about a necessary
change
in the thinking of the country
also
invent
new
items which are
absolutely
beneficial for the nation. Apart from this, adult individual is more reptile than
old
populace
because
they are healthier and their struggle, strength is longer
rather
than older
people
so
they do industry for long hours due to which
they industry
in which
company
that obtain more profit for the younger workers.
Therefore
,
young
adults
familiar with the technology such as
many
educational, medical and industrial field
make
a
use
of advanced
but
old
person not familiar with the
new
technology since it is
good
for their future generations.

Furthermore
,
old
masses have a vast experience from a year of working which is crucial in the
decision making
,
but
young
people
have no more experience for works. Thereafter, if the
young
generation population incline, then they want jobs,
but
that time law has no vacancies due to which youth are unemployment and go in
bad
company
.
For example
, in India youth do industry 70 percent.

In conclusion
, it
is suggested
by
some
of us that
old
people
are more experienced for trial. In fact,
new
workers observe all information about older workers.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages and disadvantages. v. 33

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts