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At the present time, the population of some countries include relative large numbers of young adults compared with the number of older people Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give the reasons for your answer and include any relative examples from your own knowledge or experiences. v.2

At the present time, the population of some countries include relative large numbers of young adults compared with the number of older people Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give the reasons for your answer and include any relative examples from your own knowledge or experiences. v. 2
It is true that in some countries, nowadays, there are more young citizens than elderly people. While this trend has several drawbacks, I believed that overall the benefits are more significant. There are two main reasons why a country has too many young people may have bad impacts. Firstly, the young may be lack of experiences, which is essential to do something in the best way. Therefore, they, in general, certainly make more mistakes than older people. Secondly, have more young people raise the need for jobs. Thus, if the country cannot generate enough employment opportunities for its young population, it can be a problem. Despite the aforementioned downside, there are numerous positives that young people bring to the society. To begin with, young people are more productive than older ones. This is mostly because the do not have age barrier, they do not hesitate in doing difficult tasks, which require energy and time. Besides, youngster tends to have an ability to bring about necessary changes in the thinking of the nation. It is generally accepted that young people change their attitude as per the need and always challenge the old thinking. This helps the community to grow and gain the acceptance of the global stage. In conclusion, having a more young population introduces both pros and cons. However, I am convinced that the advantages are more important than the disadvantages.
It is true that in
some
countries, nowadays, there are more
young
citizens than elderly
people
. While this trend has several drawbacks, I believed that
overall
the benefits are more significant.

There are two main reasons why a country has too
many
young
people
may have
bad
impacts.
Firstly
, the
young
may be lack of experiences, which is essential to do something in the best way.
Therefore
, they,
in general
,
certainly
make
more mistakes than older
people
.
Secondly
, have more
young
people
raise the need for jobs.
Thus
, if the country cannot generate
enough
employment opportunities for its
young
population, it can be a problem.

Despite the aforementioned downside, there are numerous positives that
young
people
bring to the society. To
begin
with,
young
people
are more productive than older ones. This is
mostly
because
the do
not have age barrier, they do not hesitate in doing difficult tasks, which require energy and time.
Besides
, youngster tends to have an ability to bring about necessary
changes
in the thinking of the nation. It is
generally
accepted
that
young
people
change
their attitude as per the need and always challenge the
old
thinking. This
helps
the community to grow and gain the acceptance of the global stage.

In conclusion
, having a more
young
population introduces both pros and cons.
However
, I
am convinced
that the advantages are more
important
than the disadvantages.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay At the present time, the population of some countries include relative large numbers of young adults compared with the number of older people Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give the reasons for your answer and include any relative examples from your own knowledge or experiences. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
231 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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