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As languages such as English, Spinish and Mandarin become more widely spoken, there is a fear that many minority languages may die out. Some countries have taken steps to protect minority languages. What is your view of this practice? v.2

As languages such as English, Spinish and Mandarin become more widely spoken, there is a fear that many minority languages may die out. Some countries have taken steps to protect minority languages. What is your view of this practice? v. 2
It is undeniable that the world becomes more development and intedrated, the need for common means of communication is becoming more pressing. Inevitably, speakers of minority languages have been under pressure to speak the languages of more dominant group. Some people think that many minority languages may disappear and government should be have methods to protecting it. In this essay, I would suggest some measures to stop this process. It is true that as the balance of power among groups of people throughout history, languages have arisen, changeg and then die out. Even one widely-spoken languages such as Latin have disappeared. To some extent, I think this process may be inevitable. However, there are examples of communities that have managed to preserve and even revive languages under threat. For instance, Irish and Scots Gaclic have been preserved by government policy on education and broadcast media. On the other hand, there are several benefits of culture are maintained such as songs, literature and local traditions. These all contribute to the richness and variety of human culture. Moreover, language help communities to remain conhesive and to have a strong sense of identify. This can help people to be strong in adversity. Where this sense of idemtify and cohesion has been lost. For example, many indigenous communities can get some problem such as low self-esteem, lack of confidence and loss of initiative. In conclusion, it is possible to make the effort to preserve minority languages. This can have benefits both for the minority speech community and for society in terms of cultural richness.
It is undeniable that the world becomes more development and
Possible spelling mistake found.
intedrated
, the need for common means of communication is becoming more pressing.
Inevitably
, speakers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minority
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
have been under pressure to speak the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
of more dominant group.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minority
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
may disappear and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should be
Consider using the past participle "had"?
have
methods to protecting it. In this essay, I would suggest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
measures to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
this process.

It is true that as the balance of power among groups of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
throughout history,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
have arisen,
Possible spelling mistake found.
changeg
and then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
out. Even one
widely
-spoken
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
such as Latin have disappeared. To
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this process may be inevitable.
However
, there are examples of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communities
that have managed to preserve and even revive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
under threat.
For instance
, Irish and Scots
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gaclic
have
been preserved
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
policy on education and broadcast media.

On the other hand
, there are several benefits of culture
are maintained
such as songs, literature and local traditions. These all contribute to the richness and variety of human culture.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communities
to remain
Possible spelling mistake found.
conhesive
and to have a strong sense of identify. This can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to be strong in adversity. Where this sense of
Possible spelling mistake found.
idemtify
and cohesion has
been lost
.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
indigenous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communities
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problem such as low self-esteem, lack of confidence and loss of initiative.

In conclusion
, it is possible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the effort to preserve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minority
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
. This can have benefits both for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minority
speech
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
and for society in terms of cultural richness.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay As languages such as English, Spinish and Mandarin become more widely spoken, there is a fear that many minority languages may die out. Some countries have taken steps to protect minority languages. What is your view of this practice? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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