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As computers are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role for teachers in the classroom. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.5

As computers are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role for teachers in the classroom. v. 5
It is true that the use of computers has been growing in popularity. While some people believe that computers will eventually replace the role of teachers in the classroom, I would argue that real teachers still play an integral part in the education of children. On the one hand, there are two primary reasons why computers have now been more and more popular in the field of education. Firstly, with the assistance of computers, a wide range of difficult lessons has become easier for students to comprehend. For example, complicated definitions of some theories in math courses can be explained by the detailed illustrations presented on the computer screen with the help of a slide projector. As a result, school students find it less complex to absorb the knowledge passed on from the computers. Secondly, it is essential for students to acquire information technology and computer skills in order to get a high- paying job in the future. It is necessary for them to start learning how to use computers at an early young age. Therefore, schools need to adopt the usage of computers in the curriculum system. On the other hand, it seems to me that despite the vast benefits of computer in assisting the knowledge acquisition of students, human teachers can not be replaced with the intelligent machines because of various reasons. One reason is that young students are usually ignorant about the different functions and features of computers, so that it seems impossible for them to study without the teacher's guidance. For instance, students from kindergarten and primary schools could not familiarize themselves with computers in the early stages of their learning journey, which seems like that only real teachers are capable of helping them to study effectively. The second reason is that it is evident that few students have self-discipline. Most of them are easily distracted when leaning with computers because they could not resist the temptation of attractiveness of computer games. As a consequence, they would abandon academic studies for the sake of these interesting games. In conclusion, I concur with those who agree with the view that it is impractical for computers to replace the role of teachers at school despite the undeniable benefits of computers.
It is true that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of computers has been growing in popularity. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that computers will
eventually
replace the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
in the classroom, I would argue that real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
still
play an integral part in the education of children. On the one hand, there are two primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
why computers have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
been more and more popular in the field of education.
Firstly
, with the assistance of computers, a wide range of difficult lessons has become easier for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to comprehend.
For example
, complicated definitions of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
theories in math courses can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
by the detailed illustrations presented on the computer screen with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of a slide projector.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
find it less complex to absorb the knowledge passed on from the computers.
Secondly
, it is essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to acquire information technology and computer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a high- paying job in the future. It is necessary for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
learning how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
computers at an early young age.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
need to adopt the usage of computers in the curriculum system.
On the other hand
, it seems to me that despite the vast benefits of computer in assisting the knowledge acquisition of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
can not
be replaced
with the intelligent machines
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
. One
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
usually
ignorant about the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
functions and features of computers,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that it seems impossible for them to study without the teacher's guidance.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from kindergarten and primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
could not familiarize themselves with computers in the early stages of their learning journey, which seems like that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
are capable of helping them to study
effectively
. The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that it is evident that few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have self-discipline. Most of them are
easily
distracted when leaning with computers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they could not resist the temptation of attractiveness of computer games. As a consequence, they would abandon academic studies for the sake of these interesting games.
In conclusion
, I concur with those who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the view that it is impractical for computers to replace the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
despite the undeniable benefits of computers.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay As computers are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role for teachers in the classroom. v. 5

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
372 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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