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Around the world, large cities face the task of dealing with rapid population increase. What problems foes urban growth cause? What are some possible solutions to these problems? v.1

Around the world, large cities face the task of dealing with rapid population increase. What problems foes urban growth cause? What are some possible solutions to these problems? v. 1
While urban growth is a sign of a country's economic development, a rapid population increase result in issues. It leads to insufficient housing available and safety concerns. This essay will discuss these problems and provide some solutions. First, As the population increase, residents in large cities do not have enough houses. The available space for per person decline, householders feel mental and physical discomfort, live unsatisfactorily environmental condition. So they start to move from home to the street outskirt of the city and build a cabin in an unhealthy situation. Housing space problem drives to another issue such as critical health and wellbeing. To tackle this issue, the government should build more public houses and rent to residents by a low-rate loan. In consequence, they prevent residents to leave their homes and live with families without any concern. The second problem caused by urban growth is safety. The rate of committing a crime is increasing as much as the city is developing. Robbing, assault, and thief are an example. Not only these, but residents also tend to do accusation. As a result of a lack of technology and acknowledge of law in large cities, the court does not separate the offender and defendant. When the defendant goes to jail, residents may lose their safe guarantee in their country. The way to solve this problem is that the government should increase a fine of accusation, install cameras in a hidden place, it is possible to commit a crime, and increase polices who examine the residential ground regularly. By this way, the government decrease resident's safety concern. In conclusion, However, large cities are developing, there are two problems resulted in its rapid population growth; safety concern and insufficient housing available. Not enough space in the resident's house effect on their mental and physical health, so they move to the street in a critical situation. As population growth, the judgment cannot separate who commit or does not commit a crime. Residents start to concern their safety. To prevent or tackle these issues, the government should run the housing and safety program.
While urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
of a country's economic development, a rapid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
result in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
. It leads to insufficient housing available and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
concerns. This essay will discuss these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
and provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solutions.

First
, As the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
,
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residents
in large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
. The available space for per person decline, householders feel mental and physical discomfort,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
unsatisfactorily
environmental condition.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
from home to the street outskirt of the city and build a cabin in an unhealthy situation. Housing space
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problem
drives to another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
such as critical health and
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
. To tackle this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should build more public
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
and rent to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residents
by a low-rate loan. In consequence, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residents
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their homes and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with families without any concern.

The second
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problem
caused by urban
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growth
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
. The rate of committing a crime is increasing as much as the city is developing. Robbing, assault, and thief are an example. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
these,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residents
also
tend to do accusation.
As a result
of a lack of technology and acknowledge of law in large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, the court does not separate the offender and defendant. When the defendant goes to jail,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residents
may lose their safe guarantee in their country. The way to solve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
a fine of accusation, install cameras in a hidden place, it is possible to commit a crime, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
polices who examine the residential ground
regularly
. By this way, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
decrease resident's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
concern.

In conclusion
,
However
, large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are developing, there are two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
resulted in its rapid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
concern and insufficient housing available. Not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
space in the resident's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
effect on their mental and physical health,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to the street in a critical situation. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
, the judgment cannot separate who commit or does not commit a crime.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Residents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to concern their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
or tackle these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should run the housing and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
program.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
40Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
One who speaks only one language is one person, but one who speaks two languages is two people.
Turkish proverb

IELTS essay Around the world, large cities face the task of dealing with rapid population increase. What problems foes urban growth cause? What are some possible solutions to these problems? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
348 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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