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An increasing number of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online. v.3

An increasing number of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online. v. 3
Nowadays, e-commerce has become popular in our society. For many people, it has become a trend in buying online. However, there are pros and cons in deciding to do this. In this essay, I will discuss some of the reasons why online shopping has positives and some of the challenges to be overcome. Let's begin by looking at the advantages of online purchases. One of the main reasons why people are inclined to shop online is for discounts. In other words, the product they purchase is relatively cheaper compared to buying it in a conventional method. Let's take Flipkart as an example, the company offers huge discounts on all categories of products ranging from clothing to groceries. During this Diwali season, their offers were so tempting that my whole family did their shopping online. Another reason why individuals prefer online shopping is that they could finish their shopping at convenience from home. Finally, many companies profit from e-commerce, especially no rental cost for their showrooms. For example, One Plus, the mobile company sells its products online only. This indicates that both individuals and companies are benefitted from e-commerce. Turning to the other side of the argument, there are few disadvantages to online shopping. First, the customers won't be assured that the product they buy is genuine. In a recent survey, more than fifty percent of customers were cheated with either by sending the wrong item or by sending used one. Secondly, e-commerce is making people less social. For instance, when I do shopping with my family, we not only buy things but also have conversations with other people in the store and develop our social network. Online shoppers will be missing the chance of networking with people. Last but not least, companies would need to spend more money on logistics to deliver the product from their warehouse to the delivery address. With an increasing trend in oil and gas rates, companies need to seriously consider. This often leads to a position where conventional shopping is simple and best. In conclusion, with an uptrend in online shopping by most of the people we need to weigh up the pros of offers provided by companies, and luxury, people can shop from anywhere and cons of customer's confidence of receiving the genuine item to make any further decision
Nowadays, e-commerce has become popular in our society. For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, it has become a trend in buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
.
However
, there are pros and cons in deciding to do this. In this essay, I will discuss
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has positives and
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
challenges to
be overcome
.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
by looking at the advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchases
. One of the main reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are inclined
to shop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
is for discounts.
In other words
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
is
relatively
cheaper compared to buying it in a conventional method.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
's take Flipkart as an example, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
offers huge discounts on all categories of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
ranging from clothing to groceries. During this Diwali season, their offers were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
tempting that my whole family did their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
. Another reason why individuals prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is that they could finish their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
at convenience from home.
Finally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
profit from e-commerce,
especially
no rental cost for their showrooms.
For example
, One Plus, the mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
sells its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
. This indicates that both individuals and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
benefitted
from e-commerce.

Turning to the other side of the argument, there are few disadvantages to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
.
First
, the customers won't
be assured
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
is genuine. In a recent survey, more than fifty percent of customers
were cheated
with either by sending the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
item or by sending
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
one.
Secondly
, e-commerce is making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
less social.
For instance
, when I do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
with my family, we not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
have conversations with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the store and develop our social network.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
shoppers will be missing the chance of networking with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
would need to spend more money on logistics to deliver the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
from their warehouse to the delivery address. With an increasing trend in oil and gas rates,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
need to
seriously
consider. This
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
leads to a position where conventional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is simple and best.

In conclusion
, with an uptrend in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
by most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
we need to weigh up the pros of offers provided by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
, and luxury,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can shop from anywhere and cons of customer's confidence of receiving the genuine item to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
any
further
decision
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
37Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay An increasing number of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
384 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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