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All over the world, the rich are becoming richer and the poor are becoming poorer. What problems does this cause? How can we overcome the problems of poverty? v.8

All over the world, the rich are becoming richer and the poor are becoming poorer. What problems does this cause? How can we overcome the problems of poverty? v. 8
It is a proven fact that the gap between wealthy and low-income families is widening whole across the globe. As a result, education has become inaccessible to the poor as well as an increase in crime rates. However, it can be tackled by imposing a high percentage of tax on wealthy people and by introducing the government welfare schemes for needy people. One of the main problems caused by the unequal distribution of wealth is that education has become inaccessible to the poor. Nowadays, quality education has become very expensive. For instance, A-class schools and colleges are incredibly costly and not within the reach of poor people. Due to this, these people are not able to compete for high paying jobs, and it becomes a fundamental disadvantage for them. Furthermore, another critical issue is the increase in crime rates. As marginalized groups most often do not make enough money to meet their basic needs, they resort to atrocious acts such as burglary and theft. To solve the grave problems caused by poverty, the government should help the needy people to improve their standard of living by offering them food, health care, and education for free or at concessional rates. Moreover, High rates of taxes ought to be imposed by the tax authorities on the high-income groups so that collected money can be spent on the welfare schemes of the poor for reducing the gap between rich and the poor. For instance, Tax authorities have made slabs for tax rates means a significant percentage for the high-income group and low proportion for the low-income group. In conclusion, it is imperative to bridge the gap between the rich and the poor for consistent growth as well as development. Efforts applied in this direction will have long-term benefits that improve the global ranking of a country.
It is a proven fact that the gap between wealthy and low-income families is widening whole across the globe.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
inaccessible to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
as well
as an increase in crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
.
However
, it can
be tackled
by imposing a high percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
on wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and by introducing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
welfare schemes for needy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

One of the main problems caused by the unequal distribution of wealth is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
inaccessible to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
. Nowadays, quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive.
For instance
, A-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
schools and colleges are
incredibly
costly and not within the reach of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Due to this, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not able to compete for high paying jobs, and it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
becomes
a fundamental disadvantage for them.
Furthermore
, another critical issue is the increase in crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
. As marginalized groups most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their basic needs, they resort to atrocious acts such as burglary and theft.

To solve the grave problems caused by poverty, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the needy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their standard of living by offering them food, health care, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for free or at concessional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
.
Moreover
, High
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
ought to
be imposed
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
authorities on the high-income groups
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that collected money can
be spent
on the welfare schemes of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
for reducing the gap between rich and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tax
authorities have made slabs for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
means a significant percentage for the high-income group and low proportion for the low-income group.

In conclusion
, it is imperative to bridge the gap between the rich and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
for consistent growth
as well
as development. Efforts applied in this direction will have long-term benefits that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the global ranking of a country.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay All over the world, the rich are becoming richer and the poor are becoming poorer. What problems does this cause? How can we overcome the problems of poverty? v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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