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TOPIC# 22 we all work in jobs with many different kinds of people. In your opinion, what are some important characteristics of a co-worker (someone you work closely with)? v.2

TOPIC# 22 we all work in jobs with many different kinds of people. In your opinion, what are some important characteristics of a co-worker (someone you work closely with)? v. 2
Co worker is a very important person in our work and our lives. In order to be comfortable in your job, you should work with a good co worker, so the work environment will be pleasant and joyful. Some people would agree that the colleague should respect us. Others would believe that kindness and should not be a jealous person are the most imperative characteristics. To begin with, colleague should be friendliness. When the person who works close to you be friendly, this will help you to solve many problems that face you. Take myself as an example, when I worked in Kingsoopers as an externship pharmacist I had a friend from china and she is lovely person. In fact, sometimes, when I need help, she didn' t hesitate to support me. Actually, she had taught me everything in the pharmacy such as data base of computer, organize the medicines by order, keep the work place in clean and even how to inter the presicrptions in the computer. I gained a lot of experience from my friend, without her I couldn' t continue in my job since other technicians did' t care about me and they didn' t talk to me even, because I was new and foreign so they didn' t like me. This experience taught me that the colleague should be friendly and good helper. Hence, in addition to friendliness, the co worker should not envy to other workers. If the colleague is jealous, this will force him to hate you and he will not help you in the work which makes the work atmosphere is not pleasent. For instance, my aunt, who is dentist, worked in the hospital close to her house. She is hard working since she loves her job and she puts a lot of effort in her work. Most of the time, her boss praised her and give her a promotion for her work. One of her colleagu is jealous and he didn' t like her so he tried to talk about her in envious way to others and he tried to exaggerate her fault even if it is nothing so this made the work unbearable. After one year, she had decided to alter her work because of her co worker was jealous. As we can clearly see, you will be upset with a jealous co worker. By the way of conclusion, based on the argument above, I strongly concur that most essential characteristics are kindness and not jealous which will help you to achieve your work effectivily and effeciantly.
Co
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worker
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
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person
in our
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work
and our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. In order to be comfortable in your job, you should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
co
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worker
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
environment will be pleasant and joyful.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
colleague
should respect us. Others would believe that kindness and should not be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jealous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
are the most imperative characteristics.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
colleague
should be friendliness. When the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
who works close to you be friendly, this will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you to solve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems that face you. Take myself as an example, when I worked in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kingsoopers
as an
Possible spelling mistake found.
externship
pharmacist I had a friend from
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
china and
she is lovely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
. In fact,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
, when I need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
, she
Possible spelling mistake found.
didn&
#039; t hesitate to support me. Actually, she had taught me everything in the pharmacy such as data base of computer, organize the medicines by order,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
place in clean and even how to inter the
Possible spelling mistake found.
presicrptions
The usual collocation for technology is "on," not "in." It is better to say this: "on the computer".
in the computer
. I gained
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
experience from my friend, without her I
Possible spelling mistake found.
couldn&
#039; t continue in my job since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
technicians
Possible spelling mistake found.
did&
#039; t care about
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
me and
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
didn&
#039; t talk to me even,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I was new and foreign
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
didn&
#039; t like me. This experience taught me that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
colleague
should be friendly and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
helper.

Hence
,
in addition
to friendliness, the co
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worker
should not envy to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
colleague
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jealous
, this will force him to hate you and he will not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
atmosphere is not
Possible spelling mistake found.
pleasent
.
For instance
, my aunt, who is dentist, worked in the hospital close to her
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. She is
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
hard working
since she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loves
her
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
job and
she puts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
effort in her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. Most of the time, her boss praised her and give her a promotion for her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. One of her
Possible spelling mistake found.
colleagu
is
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
jealous and
he
Possible spelling mistake found.
didn&
#039; t like her
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
he tried to talk about her in envious way to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
others and
he tried to exaggerate her fault even if it is nothing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this made the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
unbearable. After one year, she had decided to alter her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of her co
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worker
was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jealous
. As we can
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, you will
be upset
with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jealous
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
co worker
.

By the way of conclusion, based on the argument above, I
strongly
concur that most essential characteristics are kindness and not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jealous
which will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you to achieve your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
Possible spelling mistake found.
effectivily
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
effeciantly
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
36Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Mistakes

IELTS essay TOPIC# 22 we all work in jobs with many different kinds of people. In your opinion, what are some important characteristics of a co-worker (someone you work closely with)? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
426 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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