Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adults. What are the reasons for this rise in obesity, How could it be tackled? v.8

Nowaday one of the major problem is obesity, which arise a lots of problems with health and lifestyle also amount are rising by time. Consequently they have several reasons for this cases. First of all, the level of physical activity extremely incraesed by the last period, because high improvement of modern equepments have huge impact on human lifestyle. Hence systemized approach of technical suppots such as vehichles and robotic machines are dramaticly growth of demanding and usage today. As example we can see that every child have their gadjets, phones and almost every second people have fully equiped arrangments on it, in our country also suffering from obesity. In that case shows statistics about th level of obesity increase in high developed countries, so human being need to systemizing the shedule of day and need to add some physical activities such as in contries where the strict mention their weigth such as Japan, Korea and others. As a second is widespreaded pubs and cafes in cities, which growth day by day it can be seen by GDP level, because in the countries which suffering from poverty can not provide such as condition and evaluate enermours numbers of food courts. Such as the solution for this problem goverment need to tackle the businessmans by taxs, by this method adjustment of the individual interpreneurs and others can be regulated and also be profitble for country state. To sum up, we can compare that two solutions can be eliminate the basic human habits from over-taking the food, and minimize the level of consumtion of snaks and non healthy product demand in the world, so what i mean by that goverment need to tackle by taking taxes on consumtion of nonhealthy food and wide spreaded opening of cafes.
Nowaday
one of the major problem is obesity, which arise
a lots
of problems with health and lifestyle
also
amount are rising by time.
Consequently
they have several reasons for
this
cases.
First of all
, the
level
of physical activity
extremely
incraesed
by the last period,
because
high improvement of modern
equepments
have huge impact on human lifestyle.
Hence
systemized approach of technical
suppots
such as
vehichles
and robotic machines are
dramaticly
growth of demanding and usage
today
. As
example we
can
see
that every child have their
gadjets
, phones and almost every second
people
have
fully
equiped
arrangments
on it, in our
country
also
suffering from obesity.
In that case
shows
statistics about
th
level
of obesity increase in high developed
countries
,
so
human being
need to systemizing
the
shedule
of day and
need
to
add
some
physical activities such as in
contries
where the strict mention their
weigth
such as Japan, Korea
and others
. As a second is
widespreaded
pubs and
cafes
in cities, which growth day by day it can be
seen
by GDP
level
,
because
in the
countries
which suffering from poverty can not provide such as condition and evaluate
enermours
numbers of food courts. Such as the solution for this problem
goverment
need
to tackle the
businessmans
by
taxs
, by this method adjustment of the individual
interpreneurs
and others
can
be regulated
and
also
be
profitble
for
country
state. To sum up, we can compare that two solutions can be
eliminate
the basic human habits from over-taking the food, and minimize the
level
of
consumtion
of
snaks
and
non healthy
product demand in the world,
so
what
i
mean by that
goverment
need
to tackle by taking taxes on
consumtion
of
nonhealthy
food and wide
spreaded
opening of
cafes
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adults. What are the reasons for this rise in obesity? How could it be tackled?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
294 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts