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All over the world people watch foreign film much than locally produced films Why Should the government provide financial support to local film industries v.2

All over the world people watch foreign film much than locally produced films Why Should the government provide financial support to local film industries v. 2
There is a tendency that people all over the world prefer to foreign films rather than domestic films. The factors contributing to this trend will be discussed in this essay and I believe that local film industries should be supported be the government. The phenomenon occurs due to several reasons. Firstly, people have natural curiosity towards different cultures, they are curious about what is different from their daily life. Foreign films could provide people with the exposure of different cultures, thus, foreign films are more likely to arise their interests. Secondly, foreign films especially Hollywood blockbusters have sufficient budget to apply advanced special effects, which could provide the audiences extraordinary viewing experience. Besides, big-budget films often use famous actors and actress, and they are made by the most skilled directors and producers, which made these films more appealing to the audiences. For example, “James Bond’ is a series of films made with famous actors and advanced special effects, these factors made it won the applause of countless audiences worldwide. In my view, the government has the responsibility to support local film industries financially. To begin with, there exist many talented film-makers who lack sufficient funding to produce great films. With financial support from the government, they can be able to pay for the costs related to film-producing. This could generate more employment opportunities in film industries and increase the sales of film tickets; Films could also attract tourists, many locations became famous because of well-known films. For example, there has been an increase in tourism in New Zealand because of the film “Lord of the rings”. Consequently, supporting film industries could contribute to the economic growth. In conclusion, curiosity of people and high-quality films are two main reasons why foreign films are popular. The government should help local film industry to develop since it could positively affect the economy.
There is a tendency that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
all over the world prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
films
rather
than domestic films. The factors contributing to this trend will
be discussed
in this essay and I believe that local film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
should
be supported
be the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

The phenomenon occurs due to several reasons.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have natural curiosity towards
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures, they are curious about what is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from their daily life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Foreign
films could provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with the exposure of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures,
thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
films are more likely to arise their interests.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
films
especially
Hollywood blockbusters have sufficient budget to apply advanced special effects, which could provide the audiences extraordinary viewing experience.
Besides
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
-budget films
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
actors and actress, and they
are made
by the most skilled directors and producers, which made these films more appealing to the audiences.
For example
, “James Bond’ is a series of films made with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
actors and advanced special effects, these factors made it won the applause of countless audiences worldwide.

In my view, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has the responsibility to support local film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
financially
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there exist
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
talented film-makers who lack sufficient funding to produce great films. With financial support from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, they can be able to pay for the costs related to film-producing. This could generate more employment opportunities in film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
and increase the sales of film tickets; Films could
also
attract tourists,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
locations became
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of well-known films.
For example
, there has been an increase in tourism in New Zealand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the film “
If the term is a proper noun, use the suggested capitalization.
Lord of the rings
”.
Consequently
, supporting film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
could contribute to the economic growth.

In conclusion
, curiosity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and high-quality films are two main reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
films are popular. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
local film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
to develop since it could
positively
affect the economy.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay All over the world people watch foreign film much than locally produced films Why Should the government provide financial support to local film industries v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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