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Advertising is influencing people more and more. Is this a positive or a negative trend? Give your own opinion and examples. v.1

Advertising is influencing people more and more. Is this a positive or a negative trend? Give your own opinion and examples. v. 1
Advertising is a form of publicity which a company uses to get into the public to sell their ideas or products. The increase in the influence of it is a positive sign for the companies which symbolizes the reach of the product to the customers targeted. Personally, I feel that, as the influence grows the market grows and so the revenue of the company. But there are two cases that are to be dealt before concluding which will be done in the further discussion. In the first case if the advertisement is the relevance of the advertisement on the product and its use. In simpler words, the information given by the advertisement should not deviate from the product they provide. For example, in a condom advertisement the intimate scenes between the lead artists is not necessary on the contrary the useful information like eradication of SDTs or preventing pregnancy should be discussed. The second and the most important aspect to be considered is the transparency of the company. In other words, the company should not advertise something that can not be achieved by using the product (exaggerating). For example in one of the axe deodorant advertisements, it will be shown that a nmber of women go crazy for you if you use that perfume. This type of advertisements which will exaggerate the use of the products influence people negatively. On a whole, by examining the positives and negatives of the advertisements I conclude that the relevance and transparency of it determines the trend of the advertisement that is, whether it has a positive or negative trend.
Advertising is a form of publicity which a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
into the public to sell their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. The increase in the influence of it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
which symbolizes the reach of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
to the customers targeted.
Personally
, I feel that, as the influence grows the market grows and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the revenue of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
there are two cases that are to
be dealt
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
concluding which will
be done
in the
further
discussion.

In the
first
case if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
is the relevance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
and its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. In simpler words, the information
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
should not deviate from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
they provide.
For example
, in a condom
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
the intimate scenes between the lead artists is not necessary
on the contrary
the useful information like eradication of
Possible spelling mistake found.
SDTs
or preventing pregnancy should
be discussed
.

The second and the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
aspect to
be considered
is the transparency of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
.
In other words
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
should not advertise something that can not
be achieved
by using the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
(exaggerating).
For example
in one of the axe deodorant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
, it will
be shown
that a
Possible spelling mistake found.
nmber
of women go crazy for you if you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
that perfume. This type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
which will exaggerate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
influence
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
negatively
.

On a whole, by examining the positives and negatives of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
I conclude that the relevance and transparency of it determines the trend of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
that is
, whether it has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
trend.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Advertising is influencing people more and more. Is this a positive or a negative trend? Give your own opinion and examples. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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