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Advertising can influence the way people think, so it has negative effects. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Advertising can influence the way people think, so it has negative effects. v. 1
Nowadays, we are bombarded with advertisements on TV or billboards. Some argue that people can be negatively influenced due to that fact that these ads have changed our minds. In my opinion, I tend to agree with this idea. On the one hand, I hold the view that ads contributes positively to people. Ads tell customers about their products, providing a wide range of choice for them than before. Customers are aware that they can make a comparison between commodities in terms of the price and the quality. For example, residents are able to select the most suitable household appliance from ads. Apart from this, there are a large number of public service ads on TVs or on the internet that encourage the public to form a healthy lifestyle. The primary reason is that numerous people live a sedentary life and eat much junk food. Such kind of ads usually raise people’s awareness of the importance of a healthy life. Consequently, people gradually tend to do more outdoor activities and eat more fruits and vegetables. On the other hand, ads, to some extent, manipulates people’s thoughts. Advertisers often focus on selling a brand image by using glamorous and successful stars. Consumers are persuaded to associate certain luxury brands, such as Armani and Mercedes, with a higher social status. In this situation, people are likely to purchase these items that they don not really need on impulse, thus forming a materialist social atmosphere. In conclusion, although the tempting ads that have an adverse impact on people cannot be avoided, I still believe that the general public have profited more since ads appeared.
Nowadays, we
are bombarded
with advertisements on TV or billboards.
Some
argue that
people
can be
negatively
influenced due to that fact that these ads have
changed
our minds. In my opinion, I tend to
agree
with this
idea
.

On the one hand, I hold the view that ads contributes
positively
to
people
. Ads
tell
customers about their products, providing a wide range of choice for them than
before
. Customers are aware that they can
make
a comparison between commodities in terms of the price and the quality.
For example
, residents are able to select the most suitable household appliance from ads. Apart from this, there are
a large number of
public service ads on TVs or on the internet that encourage the public to form a healthy lifestyle. The primary reason is that numerous
people
live
a sedentary life and eat much junk food. Such kind of ads
usually
raise
people’s
awareness of the importance of a healthy life.
Consequently
,
people
gradually
tend to do more outdoor activities and eat more fruits and vegetables.

On the other hand
, ads, to
some
extent, manipulates
people’s
thoughts. Advertisers
often
focus on selling a brand image by using glamorous and successful stars. Consumers
are persuaded
to associate certain luxury brands, such as Armani and Mercedes, with a higher social status. In this situation,
people
are likely to
purchase
these items that they
don not
really
need on impulse,
thus
forming a materialist social atmosphere.

In conclusion
, although the tempting ads that have an adverse impact on
people
cannot
be avoided
, I
still
believe that the
general public
have profited more since ads appeared.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Advertising can influence the way people think, so it has negative effects. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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