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Advances in technology & automation have reduced the need for manual labor. Therefore, working hours should be reduced. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion. v.2

Advances in technology & automation have reduced the need for manual labor. Therefore, working hours should be reduced. with this opinion. v. 2
In modern world wedding ceremonies became greater and more costly, and there are different reasons for it such as greater expectations, drive of attaining a higher social status, and easiness of achieving required circumstances. In my opinion, lager marriages are an indicator of negative development considering cultural and financial results. On one hand, there are simple but strong reasons of expensive and bigger ceremonies. Firstly, it is true that today's people experience the technology and as a consequence they raise greater expectations. For instance, people use social media to follow the other's living, some of which have improved opportunities. Hence, individuals can observe large organizations like marriages and develop a set of criteria to meet for their own occasions. Secondly, most believe that a huge and costly wedding is a sign of higher social status, because it is assumed that they are rich and classy. Thirdly, compared to the past, it is easier to achieve the requirements of such an occasion such as the special places, organization companies and even cake ateliers. On the other hand, I certainly agree that big and expensive marriages are evidence of negative development. Such kind of occasions leads to cultural erosion by causing the eruption of variations in society. Also, it has financial effects on the couples apply for loans to the banks only for the wedding ceremony expenses. This is a waste of money and causes disagreements between couples. In conclusion, expectations, status and accessibility are the reasons for bigger and costly marriages, and it can be seen as a negative development since it results in cultural erosion and financial issues.
In modern world wedding ceremonies became greater and more costly, and there are
different
reasons for it such as greater expectations, drive of attaining a higher social status, and easiness of achieving required circumstances. In my opinion, lager
marriages
are an indicator of
negative
development considering cultural and financial results.

On one hand, there are simple
but
strong reasons of expensive and bigger ceremonies.
Firstly
, it is true that
today
's
people
experience the technology and as a consequence they raise greater expectations.
For instance
,
people
use
social media to follow the other's living,
some
of which have
improved
opportunities.
Hence
, individuals can observe large organizations like
marriages
and develop a set of criteria to
meet
for their
own
occasions.
Secondly
, most believe that a huge and costly wedding is a
sign
of higher social status,
because
it
is assumed
that they are rich and classy.
Thirdly
, compared to the past, it is easier to achieve the requirements of such an occasion such as the special places, organization
companies
and even cake ateliers.

On the other hand
, I
certainly
agree
that
big
and expensive
marriages
are evidence of
negative
development. Such kind of occasions leads to cultural erosion by causing the eruption of variations in society.
Also
, it has financial effects on the couples apply for loans to the banks
only
for the wedding ceremony expenses. This is a waste of money and causes disagreements between couples.

In conclusion
, expectations, status and accessibility are the reasons for bigger and costly
marriages
, and it can be
seen
as a
negative
development since it results in cultural erosion and financial issues.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Advances in technology & automation have reduced the need for manual labor. Therefore, working hours should be reduced. with this opinion. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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