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A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. v.40

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. v. 40
Social status, wealth and material possession have turned into the indicators to judge someone in the society these days while traditions, good quality and honour are no longer valued, though they are the de facto to judge a person. I agree that modern world has a completely different set of criteria for assessing or honouring a member of the society, though they are not the real elements to define a person. Earlier, societies had some specific indicators to judge a man or woman. Among the judging indicators, they preferred qualities like honesty, kindness, trusts, honour etc. But with the change of time, such pointers have vanished. Unluckily the present society prefers social status or riches to judge anyone. A real-life experience may make it simpler. Recently, I closely observed a local election in a distant part of India. Among the two candidates – one of them came from a high profile background while the other one was a shabby man who merely had his own permanent living space in the locality. The majority of the people supported the first individual. They took him granted as a gentleman as he is enriched with material possessions. On the contrary, only a few people supported the poor guy. He was unable to spend bucks for the election but was competing on some moral grounds. He dreamt of changing the society. Unluckily he was defeated by the wealthy candidate. The rich man did not allow his opposition to be an obstacle to his success. This triumph and defeat made me realise that material possessions are the key to judging as important in society. When people have enough riches to spend, they can buy social status and supports. But unfortunately, when someone comes up with humanitarian features, social elites term them as old-fashioned. They are ignored. Therefore, I think such ideas should be changed. We should appreciate the humane features than social status and material possessions. Otherwise, the consequences will be detrimental. When the social status will be the indicator to judge oneself, I believe that would be too humiliating and may lead to massive social disorder.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
status
, wealth and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
possession
have turned into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
indicators
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
judge
someone in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
these days while traditions,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
quality and
Possible spelling mistake. 'honour' is British English.
honour
are no longer valued, though they are the de facto to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
judge
a person. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that modern world has a completely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
set of criteria for assessing or
Possible spelling mistake. 'honouring' is British English.
honouring
a member of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
, though they are not the real elements to define a person.

Earlier,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
indicators
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
judge
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
or woman. Among the judging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
indicators
, they preferred qualities like honesty, kindness, trusts,
Possible spelling mistake. 'honour' is British English.
honour
etc.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
of time, such pointers have vanished.
Unluckily
the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
prefers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
status
or riches to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
judge
anyone. A real-life experience may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it simpler. Recently, I
closely
observed a local election in a distant part of India. Among the two candidates
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
one of them came from a high profile background while the other one was a shabby
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
who
merely
had his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
permanent living space in the locality. The majority of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
supported the
first
individual. They took him granted as a gentleman as he
is enriched
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
possessions
.
On the contrary
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
supported the poor guy. He was unable to spend bucks for the election
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
was competing on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
moral grounds. He dreamt of changing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
Unluckily
he
was defeated
by the wealthy candidate. The rich
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
his opposition to be an obstacle to his success.

This triumph and defeat made me
Possible spelling mistake. 'realise' is British English.
realise
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
possessions
are the key to judging as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. When
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
riches to spend, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
status
and supports.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
unfortunately, when someone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
up with humanitarian features,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
elites term them as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
-fashioned. They are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
.

Therefore
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
. We should appreciate the humane features than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
status
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
possessions
.
Otherwise
, the consequences will be detrimental. When the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
status
will be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
indicator
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
judge
oneself, I believe that would be too humiliating and may lead to massive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
disorder.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
35Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
Language is wine upon the lips. – Virginia WoolfInspirational quotes for language learners
Virginia Woolf

IELTS essay A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. v. 40

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
352 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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