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A new acquitance of yours is thinking about studying your native language. How would you convince him or her that this would be a good decision? Use specific details in your response. v.1

A new acquitance of yours is thinking about studying your native language. How would you convince him or her that this would be a good decision? Use specific details in your response. v. 1
Studying new language is the most beneficial decision for everyone. You can gain plenty of profits by using another language. If I had to convince my friend to learn Mongolian, I would give two reasons. First cause of why you should study our language is range of communication. Moreover, you can connect all people of this country, which allows understand art, religious and tradition of them. For example, you would know such as culture of nomadic tribe, greetings of each season, how to call horse by its age and watch movie, travel around the country without translator or guide by using our mother tongue. Furthermore, you will able to get job because employers prefer people who can speak many language. Thus, you will expand your knowledge, make new friends and promote your status. Second essential thing is that you would be bilingual or multi lingual which has various effective results. According to research, speaking a second language can mean that you have a better attention span and can multi-task better than monolinguals. Likewise, being bilingual is linked to health benefits. For instance, researches recently found that there is growing evidence to suggest that bilingualism can delay the onset of Dementia and Alzheimer’s disease by as much as five years. In conclusion, you will never regret for studying my native language. As a result, you would have information about Mongolia, enhance abilities, progress your career, save your money because you do not need to pay for guide, and even lengthen your time to live.
Studying new
language
is the most beneficial decision for everyone. You can gain
plenty
of profits by using another
language
. If I had to convince my friend to learn Mongolian, I would give two reasons.

First
cause of why you should study our
language
is range of communication.
Moreover
, you can connect all
people
of this country, which
allows
understand
art, religious and tradition of them.
For example
, you would know such as culture of nomadic tribe, greetings of each season, how to call horse by its age and
watch
movie, travel around the country without translator or guide by using our mother tongue.
Furthermore
, you
will able
to
get
job
because
employers prefer
people
who can speak
many
language
.
Thus
, you will expand your knowledge,
make
new friends and promote your status.

Second essential thing is that you would be bilingual or
multi lingual
which has various effective results. According to research, speaking a second
language
can mean that you have a better attention span and can multi-task better than monolinguals.
Likewise
, being bilingual
is linked
to health benefits.
For instance
, researches recently found that there is growing evidence to suggest that bilingualism can delay the onset of Dementia and Alzheimer’s disease by as much as five years.

In conclusion
, you will never regret for studying my native
language
.
As a result
, you would have information about Mongolia, enhance abilities, progress your career, save your money
because
you do not need to pay for guide, and even lengthen your time to
live
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay A new acquitance of yours is thinking about studying your native language. How would you convince him or her that this would be a good decision? Use specific details in your response. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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