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Large shopping malls are replacing small local shops in cities and towns. In your experience, is it a positive development ?

A model answer for the Large Shopping Malls Are Replacing Small Shops v. 2
According to the given topic, a standout amongst the most prominent patterns of the present world is a colossal upsurge in the number of individuals believing that large shopping malls are replacing small local shops in cities and town and it is a positive development. Although there is a radical concern that this will just prompt a myriad of predicaments in people's lives, I do not altogether acknowledge this, and i will clarify why in the following paragraphs. There are various contentions for my stance. The most prevalent one is that building large shopping malls cannot only contribute to augmenting the convenience of getting our daily needs including groceries, clothes, shoes, books and so on. Under one roof and making it a one - stop solution but also lead to numerous other advantages in various fields. With its wide scope, not only can benefit more when it comes to being effective, but they can also thrive and excel in varied areas, with much ease, efficacy and comfort. In a nutshell having big shopping malls stands one in a preponderant position, when it comes to enlarging their odds of success and perfection. However, there are a few people believing that some aspects as discussed below, can without a doubt overpower the potential merits of such malls. The cardinal point is that thanks to its repercussions, it is not only people but also a society which can suffer immensely, Besides, the impact of the mall culture on local and small shops is far reaching. Henceforth, it is clear why many are against shopping malls and their popularity. To conclude the eloquently written contentions, one can say that regardless of certain downsides the benefits of large shopping malls are indeed overwhelming and thus cannot be ignored.
According to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
topic, a standout amongst the most prominent patterns of the present world is a colossal upsurge in the number of individuals believing that large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
are replacing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
local shops in cities and town and it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development. Although there is a radical concern that this will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
prompt a myriad of predicaments in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, I do not altogether acknowledge this, and
Did you mean "I"?
i
will clarify why in the following paragraphs. There are various contentions for my stance. The most prevalent one is that building large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
contribute to augmenting the convenience of getting our daily needs including groceries, clothes, shoes, books and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. Under one roof and making it a one
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
solution
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
lead to numerous other advantages in various fields. With its wide scope, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can benefit more when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to being effective,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they can
also
thrive and excel in varied areas, with much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
, efficacy and comfort. In a nutshell having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
stands one in a preponderant position, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to enlarging their odds of success and perfection.
However
, there are a few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believing that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
aspects as discussed below, can without a doubt overpower the potential merits of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
. The cardinal point is that thanks to its repercussions, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
a society which can suffer
immensely
,
Besides
, the impact of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mall
culture on local and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
shops is
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
far reaching
. Henceforth, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
are against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
and their popularity.
To conclude
the
eloquently
written contentions, one can say that regardless of certain downsides the benefits of large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
are
indeed
overwhelming and
thus
cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
.
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IELTS essay Large shopping malls are replacing small local shops in cities and towns. In your experience, is it a positive development?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
293 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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