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A growing number of people feel that natural areas should not be exploited by people, and that they should be left as they are, while others argue that humans must use this land to satisfy their various needs, including farming and building. discuss both the views and give your opinion? v.1

A growing number of people feel that natural areas should not be exploited by people, and that they should be left as they are, while others argue that humans must use this land to satisfy their various needs, including farming and building. v. 1
Many people believe that natural areas should be protected by individuals through avoiding exploitation, whereas others think that these lands should be utilized to fulfil all the needs of human beings, including for agriculture and housing. Although the growing number of people need more land space to plant crops that sufficient for them, I believe that this pristine areas should be conserved to prevent global warming. On the one hand, humans should keep exploiting natural landscapes in order to cultivate more crops to feed all the people. This is because the number of men and women around the world is increasing exponentially, but the availability of land is not expanding that proportionate to the growing demand of people. If this continuous, they would have to keep clearing forests and other areas to complete their necessary requirements, such as food and shelter. For example, a recent report in the BBC revealed that the world is getting over-populated, and by 2030, we need three times more land area to feed all than that available today. However, I disagree with this because continuous exploitation of nature and its resources would be a havoc to all humankind. On the other hand, conserving these natural areas are essential to avoid the global rise in temperature. That is to say that trees are important to keep the atmospheric temperature to a sustainable level by absorbing carbon dioxide from the air, and releasing oxygen back through photosynthesis. If people destruct the forest to a higher rate, it would cause a disproportionate rise in carbon dioxide in the atmosphere, resulting in global warming. For instance, a recent news article in the Guardian reported that deforestation is the major cause of global warming. I agree with this view because protecting environmental space is important to keep all humans alive on the planet. In conclusion, despite the fact that people need more space for agriculture and housing as these are the basic necessities of their life, I believe that natural areas should be conserved as it is because a constant destruction of these areas would result in global warming, and eventually it would wipe out all the living things from the earth.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
should
be protected
by individuals through avoiding exploitation, whereas others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lands
should
be utilized
to fulfil all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
of human beings, including for agriculture and housing. Although the growing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
space to plant crops that sufficient for them, I believe that this pristine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
should
be conserved
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warming.

On the one hand, humans should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
exploiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
landscapes in order to cultivate more crops to feed all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women around the world is increasing
exponentially
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the availability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
is not expanding that proportionate to the growing demand of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. If this continuous, they would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
clearing forests and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
to complete their necessary requirements, such as food and shelter.
For example
, a recent report in the BBC revealed that the world is getting over-populated, and by 2030, we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
three times more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
to feed all than that available
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
However
, I disagree with this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
continuous exploitation of nature and its resources would be a havoc to all humankind.

On the other hand
, conserving these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
are essential to avoid the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
rise in temperature.
That is
to say that trees are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
the atmospheric temperature to a sustainable level by absorbing carbon dioxide from the air, and releasing oxygen back through photosynthesis. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
destruct the forest to a higher rate, it would cause a disproportionate rise in carbon dioxide in the atmosphere, resulting in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warming.
For instance
, a recent news article in the Guardian reported that deforestation is the major cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warming. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
protecting environmental space is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
all humans alive on the planet.

In conclusion
, despite the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
more space for agriculture and housing as these are the
Consider using "necessities".
basic necessities
of their life, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
should
be conserved
as it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a constant destruction of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
would result in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warming, and
eventually
it would wipe out all the living things from the earth.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay A growing number of people feel that natural areas should not be exploited by people, and that they should be left as they are, while others argue that humans must use this land to satisfy their various needs, including farming and building. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
362 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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