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A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research. v.9

A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research. v. 9
A large portion of demographic believe that animals should not be used for our livelihood because they are also living creatures have a right to live, whilst there is in abundance who have a strong urge of utilizing animals for their fundamental necessity. In my opinion, morally it is not right to kill animals, but dependent up to a certain extent is natural. Every living creature has their birth rights to live. And that makes a vast number of humans to be sympathetic towards them as animals cannot express their agony. For instance a lactating cow is not allowed to feed her calf at content, as the milk is supposed to make a good dairy business for a man and perhaps it is immoral eventually No human would do that to their infants. On the counter side when it comes to survival it becomes natural tendency to depend on any life supporting agent. Extreme climates makes hard to grow vegetation and people tend to rely on animals for food, skin etc. for example, people living in deserts cannot grow vegetation apparently makes them use meat as a prime source of food and camels as transportation. Summing up as we see some facts which purely served a business purpose for mankind in turn makes me support the animal’s right, it is not true to every extent, as people will need animals and their products at many aspects of life. So I end up suggesting the use of animals up to considerably limit and not exploit them.
A large portion of demographic believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for our livelihood
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are
also
living creatures have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, whilst there is in abundance who have a strong urge of utilizing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
for their fundamental necessity. In my opinion,
morally
it is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
to kill
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
dependent up to a certain extent is natural.

Every living creature has their birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rights
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. And that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
a vast number of humans to be sympathetic towards them as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
cannot express their agony.
For instance
a lactating cow is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to feed her calf at content, as the milk
is supposed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
dairy business for a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
and perhaps it is immoral
eventually
No human would do that to their infants.

On the counter side when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to survival it becomes natural tendency to depend on any life supporting agent. Extreme climates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to grow vegetation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to rely on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
for food, skin etc.
for example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living in deserts cannot grow vegetation
apparently
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
meat as a prime source of food and camels as transportation.

Summing up as we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
facts which
purely
served a business purpose for mankind in turn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
me support the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
, it is not true to every extent, as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and their products at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects of life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up suggesting the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
up to
considerably
limit and not exploit them.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Speak a new language so that the world will be a new world.
Rumi

IELTS essay A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research. v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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